Arts & Culture

Growing Up in a Dysfunctional Family

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Growing up in a dysfunctional family is a roller coaster ride of emotions. Here’s an understanding of how such families impact the children.

Our families have the biggest and most crucial influence on our lives. Family is unarguably the most important aspect of one’s life and gives an individual his/her identity and a sense of belonging. The dynamics of one’s family can tell a lot about how a person will grow up to be in most cases. Thus, it holds the power to make or break you.

While a normal functioning family produces mentally healthy adults, a dysfunctional family can have some serious repercussions on the overall well being of a person. A family where conflicts, misbehavior, and neglect are common deals, it is said to be dysfunctional. It is widely believed that most children borrow parental and familial traits from their families and inculcate the same when they have families of their own. Therefore, it becomes significant to identify the dynamics of one’s family and the resultant impact on oneself.

A healthy family comprises members having each other’s back and a mutual feeling of love and respect. Children are well taken care of. Children from such families grow up to become adults having high self-esteem and find it easier to form friendly bonds with people around them. They are found to be more positive and hopeful in their perspective towards life.

But the aforementioned things, sadly, don’t stand true for dysfunctional families. A family turns dysfunctional due to a myriad of reasons like mental and physical abuse, absent parent, single parent, financial crunch or drug and alcohol addiction. These can have adverse impacts on the children.

A child grows up to find abuse and neglect as ‘normal’. They tend to have lower self-image and in many cases, be a part of unhealthy relationships. People pleasing, excessive guilt and hopelessness are some other traits commonly seen in those individuals coming from a dysfunctional family.

Family is a haven we lean back on in times of difficulties. But, what if it is the family from which we need to escape? Growing up in a dysfunctional family is harder than it appears. It crushes your sense of identity and can even result in anxiety and depression. They begin seeing the world with the same perspective with which they see their families. It is dull, defeating, disempowering and even scary, at times.

Peers of such individuals need to be more empathetic and help them see the world through a brand new lens. They need to push them to see their selves with empowering light and increase their sense of self-worth.

As difficult as it may seem, it’s not impossible to overcome the ill-effects of being a part of a dysfunctional family. The most important aspect involves identifying one’s behavioral problems and getting to its roots. The process of getting better will involve a lot of unlearning and learning.

Identifying the issue will help the individual not replicate the toxic behaviors of one’s family. Creative treatment of one’s frustration will help vent the negative. Efforts towards mending the ties in the family are necessary to protect the further generations from going through similar emotional turmoil.

Growing up in a dysfunctional family is troublesome but you can either choose to replicate or repair.

Feature Image Credits: Filmy Sasi

Shreya Agrawal

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