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Spilling the Tea: Behind the Scenes of Anonymous Confession Pages

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From secret crushes to juicy revelations, confession pages provide a platform to express your unfiltered thoughts through anonymous means. However, amidst the lighthearted confessions, the disguise of anonymity that attracts such confessions becomes breeding grounds for cyberbullying. How can we navigate this complex landscape of anonymity and accountability?

Who am I? That’s a secret I’ll never tell. XOXO, Gossip Girl.

There is a notorious appeal as to why Gossip Girl lasted for six seasons. The scandalous lives of Manhattan’s elite were perhaps only relatable to us because they were told from the perspective of an anonymous outsider. Anonymity has given us a sense of security to share our most vulnerable, sometimes vicious, thoughts. The aura of anonymity has amplified through the rise of social media, as people can assume any mysterious identity and speak their minds without facing any repercussions. Confession pages are often a representation of the secrets that travel under the disguise of anonymity.

Confession pages start as a personal way to connect with people in a community. There is a sense of relief that accompanies us when we can share our most personal thoughts anonymously, however embarrassing they may seem. The confessions submitted to these pages inflict a thread of rumours and perpetuate gossip that we all enjoy consuming. These act as platforms for information dissemination in an entirely underground fashion.

Sometimes, the anonymous person will make a lighthearted confession to a crush and take on the role of a “secret admirer”.

…from section f, you are really good by beauty and more by your caring and helping nature. Thanks a lot for all you have done for me. I couldn’t gather the words to say it but I like you.

…I don’t know when I saw him I was just struck, struck with his charisma, the way he flips his hair, I don’t know if I am just romanticising him because of some character but I was just admiring him from a distance. He seemed busy, had a lot of friends, and was constantly talking to someone on call. Is he dating someone?

-@srcc_confession on Instagram

Although embarrassing at times, the anonymity of our confessions makes us more brave in expressing our vulnerabilities. It may seem silly at times; however, this is exactly the type of social currency that allows confession pages to operate successfully. On the other side, receiving such anonymous confessions may be flattering because you feel noticed and admired. However, they may also cross boundaries and reach territories of discomfort. The confessions are published on social media platforms, often popular amongst student communities, and such heightened attention may cause anxiety as we may feel constantly watched. The anonymity of such confessions further causes frustration, as there is no way of truly determining the person behind them.

On the flip side of the coin, such confession pages also provide a platform for people to perpetuate harmful and toxic comments that are hurtful to those on the receiving end.

…she thinks she is very smart and beautiful but actually she isn’t so good! Earlier I used to think she is nice but now I am sure that isn’t too good and she uses people for her use and leaves them when not req. She needs to bring her attitude down.”

-@ramjas_confession_ on Instagram

 

The problem with confession pages lies entirely here. People send anonymous confessions to secretly express their frustrations and anger towards a situation or people. Such mean-spirited comments are very offensive and perpetuate cyberbullying through these platforms. The tricky situation with confession pages is specifically the anonymity shield of both the creator of the page and the anonymous confessor. Such a hidden identity often makes it difficult to hold them accountable for their actions. This anonymity hinders their ability to effectively address their grievances and take appropriate actions, as they might not know who is making the confessions. Especially in confessions that are directly targeted through the use of names and positions, it can lead to feelings of embarrassment and powerlessness as the situation is beyond their control.

In high school, we had an anonymous confessions page and it was pretty popular because there was a considerable amount of gossip that was posted. But over time, the confessions just became really mean and offensive and some of them were just blatantly homophobic or misogynistic. I remember a friend telling me that she gets anxious whenever there’s a notification from Instagram because she’s scared that she’ll be tagged in the posts or comments or something about her was revealed. Eventually, the page died down because no one was interested anymore but looking back on it, I genuinely feel like some strict action should have been taken by the school authorities because it was basically cyberbullying.

-A pass-out high school student from New York City stated while describing her experience.

There are also serious consequences for running such platforms. In some situations, the confessors take authority over a secret or rumour and further spread it, often inflicting serious harm on others. The lines are very easily blurred as there is absolutely no transparency over the situation to hold anyone accountable. The power dynamics also come into play through the disguise of anonymity. The audience, confessors, and creators of such pages have a role to play in the presence of these platforms.

We, as an audience, engage with such content because we crave the gossip and rumours that are published through these platforms. There is a satisfying factor that accompanies us when we have an insight into what really happens in other people’s lives, however scandalous it may seem. Although we may have an understanding of when boundaries are crossed, the audience is also helpless to an extent because they have no way of holding someone accountable unless they report the page or publicly denounce it.

The accountability factor of the creator is important too. The creators of these platforms have a responsibility to ensure a safe and secure space is maintained where no one feels targeted. However, sometimes their authority over the page is also out of control. The comments, reposting, and sharing all culminate in actions beyond the capacity of the creator. When we remove the identity of the confessors, we also remove the guilt associated with passing our judgements. Therefore, accountability from all three sides diminishes, and no one faces any serious consequences.

While engaging with these platforms can offer an outlet for expression, it’s crucial to remain sceptical of the intentions behind such pages. Not everything presented is the absolute truth and extends beyond the narratives presented in such online discourses. Although we may view such pages as a retreat void where the consequences aren’t always deliberated, we must always remain introspective about our motivations and try our best to culminate in a positive environment.

Featured Image Credits: Keshavi for DU Beat

Read Also: Social Media Doing More Harm Than Good: A Student’s Take

Sri Sidhvi Dindi
[email protected]

Journalism has been called the “first rough draft of history”. D.U.B may be termed as the first rough draft of DU history. Freedom to Express.

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