Salman Khan


Make it more commercial, Chetan!

So, it wasn’t a myth. There does exist among us a human being blessed enough to find Chetan Bhagat’s literary efforts intellectually stimulating. In fact, Mr Salman Khan is so concerned with the subtlety of Chetan’s script for his new movie that he wants it redone. Not commercial enough, grumbles the superstar. Perhaps Bhagat, being the engineer that he is, put too much physics into Salman’s shirtless scenes. The new script will thus chronicle, without consorting to the laws of physics, Salman’s 1001 shirtless adventures interspersed with item numbers from Salman’s 6th, 35th and 50th girlfriends.

Dangerous philanthropy 

In a move smacking of undeniable respect and incredible imbecility, Rakhi Sawant has offered to serve Sanjay Dutt’s prison term for him. Knock knock Miss Sawant, Sanjay Dutt has not been voted out of Bigg Boss or some such reality show that you can make a tear inducing sacrifice to drive up the TRP. He is going to a real jail, bonehead!

Meanwhile, India TV have apparently decided to discontinue all operations should Rakhi Sawant’s proposed move go through. Reports claim that 30% and 40% of India TV’s gross revenue came from shows featuring aliens and Rakhi Sawant respectively.

Congress out vote shopping

Vote buying is not a path-breaking concept. Telecasting a video of you doing it on national television definitely is. We are talking about the advert lauding the government’s Cash Transfer Scheme which is already making waves.

The video stars this old man who has obviously suffered a lot. He seems more likely to skewer Manmohan Singh alive than to vote for his party. He approaches the desk and obtains the cash. A hint of a smile appears on his face. He seems to be thinking, ‘This Manmohan is not such a bad lad now, is he?’ If you try hard enough, you can even convince him that Mr Singh posses a full functional spine. Vote bought! Next.

Pope vs Durex!

Yes Mr Pope, we all know you are not down with condoms. Fair enough. But could you please avoid flying all the way down to Africa, the continent most ravaged by AIDS, and preaching against it? Kindly, converse with your imaginary friend and obtain due permissions. If He is as knowledgeable as you claim, I am sure He would understand.

Picture Credits: www.tamilwire.com

Harsh Vardhan

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Ek Tha Tiger has more story than Ready and Bodyguard put together and still it does not have much of a story. Throughout the movie, a song was playing in my head called Titanium. The lyrics go like “I’m bullet proof, nothing to lose, fire away fire away”!  Not a single bullet so much as grazes Salman khan and finally when one does he acts like it’s a prick and not a bullet!

The movie revolves around a superhero RAW agent (Salman Khan) who fights villains without breaking into sweat, is committed to his task and has not taken a leave from work in twelve years. Things change when he goes to Dublin for an assignment and encounters Zoya (Katrina Kaif). The assignment is pretty simple and requires him to only observe a scientist and check if he is leaking information to the ISI.

The first half just has the love story brewing with only fits of action in between. It is slow and the romance lacks chemistry. Tiger to too flustered to find himself in love and Zoya doesn’t really have much to do. They have tried a few cracks at humor which thankfully don’t fit the usual Salman brand and that is a relief.

If you survive the first half, the second half is far more entertaining. The story is predictable. It is filled with action sequences coming one after the other. It has the same old bollywood story of the lovers running form the world that is trying to keep them apart. Ek Tha Tiger is one of the few if not the only bollywood movie with the female protagonist doing action sequences. It’s a refreshing change to see the female protagonist stand up for herself than playing the damsel in distress. The chase even though unrealistic is well shot and crisp.

Salman Khan has stepped away from his comic avatar and quite successfully pulled off this serious role. Surprisingly Katrina Kaif has also tried her hand at acting and Ek Tha Tiger might just be her best. However the songs in the movie were really not required and the movie would have been faster and better without them.  If you start to look for loopholes, there are one too many.

In order to enjoy this movie, you need to leave your brains at home and then watch it.

Rating it, I would say two cheers for this romantic thriller!