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Bazinga

Bazinga

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A lot of mortals, Mayans, their descendants and otherwise believe that the world shall meet its end on the 21st of December of this year that has gone by, viz. 2012. As always there is the ardent group of the nay-sayers, the non-believers, the sceptics. These members of highest pig-headedness as well as optimism are found in generous dosage across the face of planet which is apparently approaching its long-forecasted doom.

The supremely intelligent coterie of people, the powers that be at Delhi University however are those who belong to the yet another category of people, the most commonly found – the sloths. If our sources are to be believed, news is that all checking of examination answer-sheets has been put on hold. This affects courses from the undergrad level, and taking its path through the post-graduate courses infiltrates the doctorate programmes. The process of checking the answer-sheet will slowly begin only after the 21st of this month, after every agency confirms that life will go on.

Our source informs us that the authorities at the University feel that in the event of the apocalypse, the declaration of results leaves no one in good stead. One one hand, it calls the teachers to check scores of answer sheets, which may all be to no avail, thus expending their energies in vain. The other concern being that they “wish that the students end their time on Earth without the additionally depressing knowledge of their scores”, though exceptions may abound for the sundry genii who populate the University in peaceful cohabitation. For them, we offer our commiserations.

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Sex Amma

Sex Amma

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Amma… Hello, I’m a girl and studying in girl college…always surrounded with girls and there is no opportunity to meet and date with guys at all…what to do??!

And second question is, I have friend of mine…m a girl she is a girl too. I guess I love her… whenever she with me m so happy when she is not here m upset…soooo…smtmz she hugs me to support me…at that time I wanna kiss her to lips. ..Have a sex. I think I love her but she doesnt know…I want her. If she will become to knw about that she will avoid me and never speak with me.

I know it is wrong thats why looking for guy not become abnormal…thank you..

 

 

Ahh, my poor, perplexed little machchi. Amma’s heart goes out to you.  There comes a time in all our lives when we are faced with questions whose answers could alter our lives drastically. You, my sweet coconut pudding, seem to be in a similar situation.

Kanna, despite what those around you might tell you, falling in love with someone from the same sex is neither abnormal nor a sin. In fact, Amma finds the idea quite scintillating. *wink*

If you’re throwing your net around to catch the male species only because you want to be ‘normal’, then you’re going to catch all the wrong fish. What you need to figure out, as of now, is whether you like the puttu pipe or the vessel that it goes into, if you know what I mean. *winks, again*

And if by the end of this hopefully eye opening reflection upon your sexual preferences, you would have found out which way you want to swing. And if you want to dip your, ahem, feet in both pools and live by Amma’s Golden Rule of more is always better, that’s fine too!

And don’t forget, if he/she can’t accept your louve, it’s better to move on than to hang around hoping they’d come running into your arms, full on Bollywood style. Even Yash Chopra’s taken his leave now.

 

Have a query? But don’t know who to ask? Mail  your queries to Sex Amma at [email protected].

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DUB Speak

The iTunes Store Has Arrived

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“Now you can shop at the world’s No.1 music store. Which means you can browse and buy songs, albums and films anytime you want.” This is the proclamation that the Apple website makes to inform us all that the iTunes store is now accessible in India. Thereafter the site just brags a little, typical Apple eh? The good, rather great news is that now we all can shop for music, movies etc. right from our desktops. But then again, this news is sweet symphony only to those of us who aren’t acquainted with torrent or steer clear of downloading illegal content, I’m trying very hard not to crack wise on this part of the audience.

Nevertheless this is monumental news, as there were a good amount of rumours that Apple was running for exit from India a few years back. We must also bear in mind that it took the company decades to bring the iTunes Store to India even though the company had made its appearance long back. In a conference call with investors and analysts on July 24, Apple CEO Tim Cook said that he loved India but there was little business opportunity in the country to sell the company’s products. India had influenced Steve Jobs in many ways and still India stayed hungry and foolish for the iTunes store for a very long time.

Enough of the gripes and grumbles look at the bright side; we can download Dabangg 2, Talaash and other sound tracks side by side with Taylor Swift and Bob Marley songs! Angry Birds, AC/DC and A R Rahman all on the same portal, guys it is the Pandora’s Box of entertainment!

So Yellow Submarine, Yo Yo Honey Singh, Rolling in the Deep and Fevicol Se all under the same roof, is this a sign of the impending apocalypse?

Anugrah Gopinath

[email protected]

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Arts & Culture

The Lost Symbol by Dan Brown

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The book starts with a call to Robert Langdon, a symbologist, getting a call from his mentor, Peter Solomon. What follows is the beginning of his journey to find the Ancient Mysteries, which are to be kept out of the reach of wrong hands. The plot reminds us of The Da Vinci Code, which had characters that were almost identical to the ones in The Lost Symbol. The plot gets a little predictable, especially when somebody has read the previous novels by Brown.

The chase by the CIA is very much predictable. Officer Sato, however, brings a wave of freshness when first introduced. Brown again makes use of paintings and hidden puzzles. The story is set in Washington D.C. and its past and revolves around the Freemasons. It does create suspense and thrill and makes us turn the pages in a hurry.

Brown attempts to make the narration enlightening, but ends up dragging it on and on. The climax would have been much better, had the Ancient Mysteries been something else than the obvious Holy Bible. A cellar full of texts aging beyond the Bible would have been nice.

The book does show Brown’s vast knowledge about arcane history, philology, symbolism, art and architecture, and his talent to weave this knowledge into the plot. Like the other two books, it certainly is well-researched and the story is well-told. It is commendable work but needed a little more freshness and variation to make it stand out.

Shreya Mudgil

[email protected]

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Arts & Culture

Review: Life Of Pi

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A decent amount of knowledge of the book, a fare share of exposure to Ang Lee’s work, and every friend’s Facebook or Twitter grandiloquence about the movie- this was the baggage that we carried when we entered the movie hall to watch the Life of Pi. We indeed chatted up a lot about the movie and all our varied expectations, only to drop them all and get completely engrossed in the film within the first five minutes itself.

For starters this movie is a huge ray of hope for 3-D animation, the opening song and sequence is evidence to this. For me personally 3-D had lost its charm with movies like Don 2 being released in caveman quality 3-D. In many places Ang Lee’s camera portrays places like Pondicherry in a very pristine way. And for that matter this movie is very much grounded in nature, the environment and nature’s miracles, or its processes in the purest of form.

Coming to the performances, the actors in the movie have done an exceptional job. Suraj Sharma, who plays Pi for most part of the movie, has done a great job, and as a new comer is like a breath of fresh air. What deserves special mention is the fact that Suraj spent most of his screen time as Pi, who is stranded in the middle of the Pacific with wild animals and this is where his real talent shows. He has done surprisingly well given the fact that he was acting all alone before as green screen and really brings the story to life. Irrfan Khan- naam hi kaafi he, and this holds true even for this movie. The scenes where he is on screen his eyes did the talking, and when he is the off-screen narrator the timbre of his voice moves the audience along with the story. What is striking about Irrfan Khan’s character is his accent. “He (Ang Lee) told me to have a French- Canadian- Indian accent.” Irrfan Khan was quoted saying on a TV show. And that is very true; Irrfan keeps his signature, ere of mystery alive even in this quirky tongue. Tabu played her part of a typical Indian mother very well and together with Adil Hussain (playing the part of her husband) keeps the dynamics of a typical Indian household alive. Last but not the least, the animals, the movie has woven the parts of the animals so beautifully in the story that they leave a lasting impact on all. The film is doused with scenes where the animals interact with the audience, and Richard Parker- the majestic Bengal tiger takes the lead here. The audience is left pondering over the part those animals had to play that were stranded along with Pi on a lifeboat. The movie also delves into the realm of the divine and for that matter divinity is a major subject that the story uncovers.

For those of you who have read the book, let me give you some good news, there are many elements in the movie that are different from the paperback. Let me also tell you to be prepared for many, many surprise scenes that Ang Lee drops like bombs on the audience.  I risk sounding like a spoiler but let me say this though, there will be a lot of fireworks when you expect the waters to be still.

The lasting image that the film leaves is that of the surreal cinematography, and the careful story telling that keeps everything fascinating yet close to reality so that the surreal doesn’t seem to be unreal, hats off to Ang Lee for that.
The Life of Pi deserves 4 out of 5 beats!

 

Anugrah Gopinath
[email protected]

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Campus Central

VC's First Durbar Evokes Mixed Response

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Many students and teachers marked their presence outside Gandhi Bhavan in the North Campus on Thursday to put forward their complaints and grievances. Delhi University Vice Chancellor, Dinesh Singh, organised a public meeting in the midst of protests by students and teachers against rejection of 32 applications for special chance and evaluation system. Grievances of students and teachers were heard by the VC and Singh also promised to resolve attendance-related issues of a batch of students from Dyal Singh College who, after being allowed to write three semester exams, were suddenly detained from writing the fourth due to lack of attendance. He also heard another student who was detained from writing her law exam for lack of attendance due to pregnancy Later DUSU brought the protest to the door of Gandhi Bhawan. “Vice-Chancellor hai, hai,” said a group of students holding black flags. After about half-an-hour of negotiations between the students and the Proctor, the Students Union’s office-bearers were allowed inside. Delhi University Students Union (DUSU) President Arun Hooda argued why they were not informed about the durbar and why they needed to fight to get inside and participate in durbar. The Union also questioned the decision of denial of special chance to students which allows them to take exams they earlier could not during the time of their graduation due to any emergency, in reply to which Mr. Sigh said that special chance placed a tremendous amount of pressure on the exam branch. He also added that  such a provision could be allowed again if the students could give him in writing that they will have no objections to the results of those currently studying in DU being delayed because of special chance. Singh’s team explained that the provision was withdrawn to give “relief to exam branch”. To accommodate re-testing of students who took admission years ago the university has to dig up years-old syllabus, set question papers and then find people to evaluate them accordingly. Anger burst out after Academic Council’s standing committee rejected all 25 cases of “special chances” which the Delhi High Court earlier this week had recommended to the panel to be “reconsidered”. The Vice Chancellor later assured that the 25 cases were rejected in their present form as the documents were insufficient and will be reconsidered later. VC called this meeting a bit of success and said that “this is not a one-off public discussion, but will be happening every Thursday whenever I am in the city.” He further added that everybody was welcome and no prior appointment was needed. However Saikat Ghosh, a DUTA member said, “Having a cup of tea with us will not make everything alright, we will soften our stand only if he is genuinely interested in sensitively addressing our concerns”. Image source: The Hindu Sakshi Gupta [email protected]]]>

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Campus Central

VC’s First Durbar Evokes Mixed Response

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Many students and teachers marked their presence outside Gandhi Bhavan in the North Campus on Thursday to put forward their complaints and grievances. Delhi University Vice Chancellor, Dinesh Singh, organised a public meeting in the midst of protests by students and teachers against rejection of 32 applications for special chance and evaluation system.

Grievances of students and teachers were heard by the VC and Singh also promised to resolve attendance-related issues of a batch of students from Dyal Singh College who, after being allowed to write three semester exams, were suddenly detained from writing the fourth due to lack of attendance. He also heard another student who was detained from writing her law exam for lack of attendance due to pregnancy

Later DUSU brought the protest to the door of Gandhi Bhawan. “Vice-Chancellor hai, hai,” said a group of students holding black flags. After about half-an-hour of negotiations between the students and the Proctor, the Students Union’s office-bearers were allowed inside. Delhi University Students Union (DUSU) President Arun Hooda argued why they were not informed about the durbar and why they needed to fight to get inside and participate in durbar.

The Union also questioned the decision of denial of special chance to students which allows them to take exams they earlier could not during the time of their graduation due to any emergency, in reply to which Mr. Sigh said that special chance placed a tremendous amount of pressure on the exam branch. He also added that  such a provision could be allowed again if the students could give him in writing that they will have no objections to the results of those currently studying in DU being delayed because of special chance. Singh’s team explained that the provision was withdrawn to give “relief to exam branch”. To accommodate re-testing of students who took admission years ago the university has to dig up years-old syllabus, set question papers and then find people to evaluate them accordingly.

Anger burst out after Academic Council’s standing committee rejected all 25 cases of “special chances” which the Delhi High Court earlier this week had recommended to the panel to be “reconsidered”. The Vice Chancellor later assured that the 25 cases were rejected in their present form as the documents were insufficient and will be reconsidered later.

VC called this meeting a bit of success and said that “this is not a one-off public discussion, but will be happening every Thursday whenever I am in the city.” He further added that everybody was welcome and no prior appointment was needed.

However Saikat Ghosh, a DUTA member said, “Having a cup of tea with us will not make everything alright, we will soften our stand only if he is genuinely interested in sensitively addressing our concerns”.

Image source: The Hindu

Sakshi Gupta
[email protected]

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DUB Speak

College Misfits

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Every college of Delhi University has a culture of its own which defines it. The culture is as instrumental in getting the college a ranking on the glossy pages of the most-prestigious education magazines, as it is in getting its students to feel what they do about the dynamics of the subject that is, “college and me”.

One of the most unfortunate things that could ever happen to a student, all strapping him up for the big-bad world is that he finds himself fenced in by people, fellow students he is not able to associate with. (This statement is made, notwithstanding the age-old adage- “It’s all in the mind”).

Following is what the self-confessed misfits had to say about the college they are still struggling to adapt to the ethos of.:

Shri Ram College of Commerce:

I have always been rather flippant about things and more creative and subjective than moulded into a thought frame which gives me opinions about what’s happening in this world in general. Encountering people by the dozen everyday in college, who would kill to glamorise their CVs and who swear by the “B-plan and Case Study lexicon” in all their discussions, and with little encouragement by the college authorities to talk about activities I could more relate to, like music and Art, I have just never been able to feel that sense of belongingness to this place, or more precisely, to the crowd. Also, the course (in my case) has never been an incentive to feel happy about the place.

Lady Shri Ram College:

I longed to find nutcases of girls around me in the campus, but in vain. The girls were (with no offence meant) always prim and proper, with hair in place, and a certain “LSR twirl” on their tongues. The fantastical college world I had imagined for myself in my dreams came crumbling down when I first set foot on the grounds of this institution. I almost resigned, calling “this” part of the world extensively phony. Though I still feel lost, I think I have come to terms with the culture of the college.

College has a huge role to play when it comes to shaping the person you would be. When they regurgitate the idea of, “choosing course over college”, they’re not entirely wrong, as when the chips are down, you have the refuge of your books at least because if the college refuses to choose YOU, you’re in for trouble for the next three years of your life.

 

Vatsala Gaur
[email protected]

Image credits: Additi Seth
[email protected] 

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Campus Central

Aung San Suu Kyi felicitated at LSR

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For someone who has had to endure as much as Burmese pro-Democracy leader Aung San Suu Kyi for such an extended period of time, it is no less than fascinating that she still retains a youthful charm, made even more potent accompanied now by an ethereal aura. One would imagine that the unrelenting crackdown on their cause, the innumerable attempts at their life, the taxing period of house arrest and the pain of separation from their loved ones would be adequate to crush anyone’s spirit. But like a phoenix that rises from the ashes, she has risen again, with a renewed vigour towards the realization of her cause for democracy for her people. This was something that was visible to all this morning, at her alma mater, Lady Shri Ram College.

Suu, as she was lovingly called during her college days studying Political Science here, arrived at the college for an emotional ‘homecoming’ just past 9.30 am. Accompanied by Hon’ble Minister of State for HRD Shashi Tharoor and several other dignatories including former Union Minister Mani Shankar Aiyar, she was greeted by current students of the college sporting traditional Burmese skirts or longyis, staff as well as her former teachers, as she made her way through a packed college auditorium up the stage for the commencement of her felicitation ceremony. After welcome addresses by the Principal, Dr. Meenakshi Gopinath, the Chairperson Mr. Arun Bharat Ram and Dr. Shashi Tharoor, the Nobel laureate renowned for her intransigent fight for democracy, was honoured by the distinguished panel.

Perhaps the most riveting of the moments was her stirring unrehearsed speech, in which she reached out to ‘her girls’, and all young people at large. She acknowledged the support she always received from the institution, even in times when she had little contact with the outside world and remarked, “… My faith in the oneness of human aspirations is justified.” She further touched upon the “emotional connection” she had with the people of India, and thanked them for their support through trying times. “I feel myself partly a citizen of India”, she said. Addressing young political aspirants, she warned against “unprincipled politics”, urging them to never compromise on their principles if they were to enter the political arena. She concluded by asking for continuing support in the last few steps that Burma had left towards democracy, effectively consolidating all the hearts she had already conquered.

 

Tanya Dua
[email protected] 

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