DUB Speak

What do edgy teens look for while dating?

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Having unconventional taste and general dislike for norms might make it tad bit difficult for edgy teens to find someone who understands and respects their choices and here is what they are looking for when it comes to dating.

With unconventional tastes, anxious personality and general exasperation with the societal structure, edgy teens have become more impatient when it comes to dating. We have no time for simpering and cliché romantic plot-line straight out of a Bollywood movie playing out in real life.

Edgy personality is result of looking at our society and acknowledging its structural flaws. We develop our own unconventional taste whether it is love for gothic fiction, classic movies, death metal, piercings, tattoos, etc. We are the risk-takers who want to challenge the established status quo and this reflects in our taste which could easily offend or drive a lot of people away.

It becomes imperative for us that the partner that we decide to date understands our personality and is in consonance with our weird frequency that might be unappealing to lot of people. Nothing is more of a turn off when your partner constantly nags you and tries to “tame” you into acting in a particular acceptable way.

We understand diversity. We respect diverse views, culture, personality, etc. We don’t want a carbon copy of ourselves whose interest matches ours completely. Similar view point is great but difference is what adds spice to any long-term relationship. The yang to my yin, the light to my dark or to put it more stylistically calm to my edgy.
Personally, I find the person who understands me quite attractive. The one who will listen with no judgements and even encourage me in my demented gothic writing, watch me jam around to ‘I hate everything about you’ by Three Days Grace and most importantly laugh at my dark sense of humour which crops up at most unfortunate times.

Everyone is edgy in their unique way, but everyone of them is highly opinionated. We don’t like to undermine our opinions just because ‘the sole love of our life’ decided that their taste is superior than ours. If you are going to come into our life with your opinions which are meant to belittle ours, we won’t think twice before dumping you. The rule is simple, respect begets respect.

As my one edgy friend from Kamala Nehru college has rightly put, “So, I’m very opinionated, whatever my likes or dislikes are, they are very strong. I have now learnt I need to look for people who are okay with my choices and my likes and dislikes while having their own as well. I don’t want my significant other to shy away from their opinion or demean mine because otherwise you get into arguments and shitty relationships”
We hear you and trust me this is also the most attractive thing about you that you don’t let anyone undermine your opinions just for the sake of love and acceptance.

Then comes space. Another factor that will decide whether we will last long or not. I love my personal space with no disturbance, no constant nagging to go out to socialize every weekend and no obligations to do normal couple stuff. Don’t get me wrong, I crave affection and adorkable actions as well but in a certain limit, beyond that I might want out.

Another friend of mine elaborates, “Space for me is necessary, I cannot do dates every other day or the charm in the relationship runs out for me. I also prefer dating casually, this prevents attachments in long run and also gives me mental and emotional space to take things slowly rather than head-long rushing into toxic, clingy relationships.”

In the end, it is all about compatibility, respect and mutual understanding for any relationship to survive. However, your partner needs to be in tandem with things that make you tick as much as with things that they adore and when such inevitable click happens your search for ‘the one’ ends.

Featured image credits: Tumblr

Antariksha Pathania
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Journalism has been called the “first rough draft of history”. D.U.B may be termed as the first rough draft of DU history. Freedom to Express.

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