Sex Amma

Sex Amma: Breaking up with someone

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Q. Amma, I’ve been in a relationship with this girl for about 7 months now and I want to break up with her. The problem is that whenever I try to tell her that I want to stop seeing her, she gets very sentimental and I end up consoling her with no progress. What should I do? I’m not a shallow human being, it’s just that I feel that we’re not very compatible.

A.Foremost: think 10 times before doing this.
My dear rasam, this problem of yours reminds Amma of the tales of love-stricken boys from the dosa gang of engineering colleges who wouldn’t let go of Amma when she would tell them that it’s over. Amma herself struggled with the issue for quite a while in her times, but eventually stumbled across the recipe to break up with someone who had gotten over-attached to her. The answer to your problem is not as simple as making fried idlis.

The solution in itself is a process. You’ve to be gentle with the little macchi. You’ve to explain to her why you think that you guys shouldn’t be together. Amma knows it’s a cliché but you’ve to tell her that it’s not her but you, as it is truly the case with you. You’ve to appeal to her logical side, which Amma knows gets trapped under the chutney of emotions in such cases, and explain to her that the relationship has run its course and it’s time and that you two part ways before you start hating each other. And as for avoiding making her uncomfortable in public, solitude is the key. Take her on a walk in a big park and explain it all to the sweet little macchi (oh! She’ll cry!Amma’s heart is already bleeding for the poor soul!). Please console her. Think of breaking up as removing a bandage slowly and smoothly instead of ripping it off as most rasams usually do.

Providing guidance to the students of DU since 2008 on matters of sex, dating and intimacy, Amma is back again this week with her dose of advice. Want to ask Amma a query? Mail it to [email protected].

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