DUB Speak

Y U murder English by typing lyk dis?

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R U 1 of dose whu type lyk dis?

If you are, disclaimer: All items in this article are purely coincidental and are not intended to harm or offend anyone from any background, religion or gender.

I understand that it’s the technological era and we live in the ‘SMS language’ world. But now that we have smart phones and QWERTY keypads on almost all phones, why would anyone want to use short hands anymore?

Guys, let me tell you a secret (applies to girls too actually). Typing in short forms is turn off. And bad grammar is even more so. Yes, I’m one of those people who correct their partner’s grammar while he’s being romantic with me. Yes, I know I totally kill the moment but dude, the grammar kills it before I do!

I was in class yesterday and I was trying to decipher what my chemistry teacher meant half the time while she was speaking. ‘You should be write’, ‘that phenomenon will be occur’ or ‘this is the belongs to’ are just some of the phrases which totally killed my concentration regarding more important facts. Microsoft Word underlines these phrases in green proving that it is not right to murder English like this!

Yes, English can be confusing at times. Specially the pronunciation part. Like why is ‘ch’ pronounced differently in Christmas and chair. Or why shock has the same sound but different spelling as stalk. Why cut is not pronounced similar to put, even though they have the same letter ‘u’ in between. Why the past tense of fall is fell but that of call is not cell.

It takes years and maybe a lot of reading practice to actually get a lot of words and their combinations right along with their meanings. Why finish and complete can be used one for another while talking about work but not so when talking about finding a life partner. I read a joke recently which explained the meaning of the two: finding a soul mate completes you. Finding a soul mate while you’re married to someone else finishes you and getting caught with that soul mate by your partner completely finishes you.

Words used in Hindi may not be used in a similar manner in English. For example, in Hindi, the plural of sheep is countable but in English, the plural of sheep is not sheeps but a flock of sheep. There is no word as ships or fishes; it is a fleet of ship or a school of fish.

Good English makes for good reading. Perfect grammar makes for a satisfactory article. For an English student, using a comma in the right place is as important as adding salt to lemonade. Otherwise ‘let’s eat, my friend’ won’t be any different from ‘let’s eat my friend’ and that won’t really be a nice thing to do now, would it?

Surbhi is a down-to-earth person who is passionate about writing and travelling. Currently a student of Hindu College, she wants to be a pilot and see every nook and corner of the world. From really bad PJs to her obsession with ET and Snowy, one experiences totally craziness with her. She has an adventurous bucket list which includes a ‘been-there-done-that’ tick on cliff diving and bungee jumping already!

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