At a time when people are becoming more and more dependent on the Internet as a source of information, there is a need to look into from where we’re getting that information, and if it’s something we should be relying on.

Over the past decade, anyone who has had the slightest interaction with the internet and social media platforms has come across memes- a concept that has completely taken over our perception of information, humour and interactions online. Merriam Webster defines memes as an amusing or interesting item (such as a captioned picture or video) or genre of items that is spread widely online especially through social media.

Memes have gone from minor sources of temporary entertainment to a way of humorous expression of facts and opinions. While that may seem like an effective way of relaying information, it more than often is not.

Mike Godwin, in 1990, said that “As an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches 1”, a statement that is popularly known as Godwin’s Law today. The intention of this ‘law’ was to counter the comparisons with Nazi Germany, something that he felt was disrespectful to those who’d suffered due to the Holocaust. This example, however, throws light on how memes impact the way we think and how they normalise events and thought processes that maybe shouldn’t be normalised.

Now the question is, how is meme culture problematic when related to serious issues? Firstly, Memes rely on simplification- and at times, an oversimplification. In a situation like that, it becomes hard for the target audience of a meme to understand the true essence of a particular situation or issue that a meme is trying to represent. Issues like conscription, the refugee crisis, etc. cannot be properly portrayed in stills and references from Call of Duty (the video game) or videos of crabs dancing, and that lack of proper understanding rarely leads to large scale political awareness or discourse.

Secondly, there is no responsibility and accountability on the part of the meme creator to provide factually correct information. It is also harder to trace misinformation back to the creator in case of memes than it would be in other cases, such as news reports. In a world where what we see and read on the internet instantly becomes the basis on what we form our opinion, that lack of responsibility is a dangerous issue, because people can be made to think in certain ways without being entirely aware of all the facts. An example of this could be the 2016 US Presidential Election, where a number of people came out and claimed how they ‘memed’ Donald Trump into the office in 2016, with a similar trend being observed with far-right groups in France. This ability to twist public opinion trivialises processes such as elections.

Thirdly, memes often end up being about pulling opponents down and trolling them, rather than talking about issues. An example would be the recent meme war between the Aam Aadmi Party (AAP), Congress and Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP) in the run-up to the Delhi State Elections. All sides have tried to use memes to reach out to a younger audience, but have focussed only on how the other sides failed to deliver. In that case, problems they should be highlighting have taken a backseat and thus become trivialized.

These issues were seen very recently when the USA killed Qasem Soleimani, an Iranian general, which led to a war-like situation in the middle east for several days. However, the reactions we saw on the internet were not those that promoted dialogue and a proper understanding of the issue, instead, we saw insensitive memes that ignored reality, such as one which explained how to fake mental illnesses to avoid getting drafted in the army. This war would definitely not take place within the boundaries of the United States, and at a time when people’s lives in the Middle East were at stake, making jokes on it is a move that lacks empathy. This instance proves how meme culture makes light of severe issues that could potentially have negative impacts on a very large scale.

Clearly, there’s a need for a more sensitive and empathetic world in order for us to counter and move forward from the problems that we are facing. In order for that to happen, it’s important to change the way we utilise and look at memes.

Feature Image Caption: “The intentional pairing of a man pointing a gun at the viewer with the concept of refugees, combined with the intentionally shocking font and color is nothing less than fear-mongering and manipulation that would have made Joseph Goebbels proud.”

Feature Image Credits: The Daily Utah Chronicles

Khush Vardhan Dembla

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We all have heard or seen the so-called stakeholders of our culture, according to whom the Indian Culture is threatened by even trivial things like the relationship between two individuals or even a dress worn by someone but is this really the case?

The Indian culture today as I think of it is not harmed by what people do or follow of it but its harmed mostly by what people think of the Indian Culture. When we say that same-sex marriage and LGBTQ rights were not and are not a part of the Indian culture, we are believing fallacious teachings. When we say that eating pork or eating beef is prohibited by Indian Culture then again we are mistaken. When I say Indian culture, I refer to Hinduism, as it is not just only a religion but it’s more of a culture, which has been shaping the lives of Indians irrespective of their religion for a very long time. Most people have misunderstood the Indian culture and thought of Hinduism as contemporary culture, whereas it is an ancient yet modern culture that has bettered over the years. Like, in Indian Culture we have the idea of polytheism but as none of the modern religions have that, many people try to mold the Indian Culture into a monotheistic ideas, as a result of which we have emergence of supreme godly figures like Rama, Krishna, Ganesha, etc., whereas according to our scriptures a Hindu isn’t obliged to worship anyone deity or power. Instead one can worship whatever helps them to live a better life. This is the exact reason why Hindus also pray mountains like Mt.Govardhan. The modern world is not able to easily understand Hinduism, which not only includes foreigners but also us Indians. India or Aryavrat as it was called earlier was often referred to as the land of seekers by Greeks and Romans, the reason for this is that Indians were known to have the freedom to question their faiths and beliefs. In the western world, the church often barred and even punished scientists. As a result of this, most of the researchers in the western world were atheists. They thus, advocated that science and religion can never grow or prosper together. Whereas when we come to India and even other ancient eastern civilizations like China, we see that most of the scientists here were in fact saints and sages. Moreover, they believed in religion as much as others did and maybe even more. Examples such as Sushruta, Charaka, Aryabhatta, etc. are proof of this theory.  We do not have only one scripture which is important to us but we have many, we have Vedas, we have the Puranas, we have the Upanishads, etc. on the other hand, we have various examples such as Maa Lakshmi, Maa Durga, Shakti, etc. as women whom we worship today as Devis or goddesses, which tells us how much the Indian culture respected the woman. Coming on the LGBTQ front, Brihanala, the great warrior of the epic Mahabharata was also part of the LGBTQ community and she never was discriminated upon by anyone instead she was a ‘Maharathi’ which is equivalent to a military general today and yet after millennia women today have to even prove that they are eligible for protecting their own motherland. The Indian culture was also very welcoming to foreign relations and foreign people and we as a culture have never sent out even one missionary to convert people forcefully into our religion and our culture as we thought that religion is something which is based on choice and not compulsion. These achievements of Indian society itself is the very answer to why Indian Culture is threatened. Today we have changed ourselves from a free society to one where questioning our own faith is perceived as sin. The so-called stakeholders of our culture have made us believe that God is supreme and questioning him would be iniquitous. We have been made to believe that if we eat a certain type of food then we world become sinners. We have been taught that in order to be content we have to follow someone blindly and that we can’t do that alone.

So, according to me the greatest threat that the Indian culture today faces is the molding of the Indian culture into a so-called contemporary culture which cannot understand the idea of welcoming everyone, thinking the world as a family, promoting LGBTQ and women equality rights, seeking for knowledge outside of scriptures and most importantly the freedom of being able to ask the one’s God questions and interpreting the God in one’s own way, as the Rig Veda says and I quote

“The supreme power is always one and his various qualities are what we worship as devtas.”

This tells us the Indian Culture promotes singularity and plurality together. Thus, to save our culture we have to make sure that we do not hesitate to ask questions on each and every aspect of our culture, we have to make sure that we never blindly follow any person or superstition and above all, we respect the personal faith of each individual around us. Our culture isn’t vulnerable to the clothes we wear or the food we eat but it is very much vulnerable to our own narrow mind-set.

Feature Image Credits: Navya Jindal for DU Beat

Aniket Singh Chauhan

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It doesn’t come as a surprise that India has the lowest divorce rate in the world, which sounds good but isn’t necessarily a good sign.

According to a report, stating the ten most and least divorced nations, India stood at the lowest with a contribution of 1% to the total divorces in the world.

Only 13 marriages out of 1,000 result in divorces in our country, making it even less than 1% which clearly tells us that people here are more comfortable with unhappy marriages rather than a broken marriage. Couples could be living under the same roof but be separated for years, maintaining a thin line between failed marriages and divorces.

The main reason for this atrocity remains societal pressure. People think that they are liable to live according to society’s idea of what counts as a good life, which is basically putting efforts for everybody’s happiness but yours. The need for seeking everyone’s validation has made our decisions restricted and counterproductive.

Furthermore, the concept of arranged marriages completely ignores the needs of the only two people involved. As long as their families are happy, who cares about them? And these are the same families who turn their backs on the couple when they are withstanding marital problems by giving the ultimate solution, “Have a kid, that’ll solve everything”.

Apart from this, there is hardly any concept of remarriage in our society, so a lot of people drop the idea of divorce and incline towards adjusting due to the fear of dying alone rather than having a second chance at love. Because, after somebody gathers all the courage to let go of an unhealthy marriage and start a new life, how dare they consider moving on with someone new?

How many times have we compromised our happiness over the thought of log kya kahenge? This fear is indulged inside us so deeply that we follow the ideology of “Sanskar over happiness” but at what stake?

Staying in failed marriages not only creates life long problems but also promotes the mentality in the future generations that it’s okay to stay with someone you’re not happy with, only giving rise to toxic relationships with a dead end.

We’re long into 2019 and still the Indian society, a society whose utopian dreams has made the younger generation hell-bent on westernising themselves, remains deeply rooted in centuries’ old values. Low divorce rate might look nice and ideal on paper but in practical, it hints at the rigidity in our society. Indian society needs to understand that divorce is not the end of a happy marriage but an escape from a bad marriage. In the end, it results in two happy individuals rather than one miserable couple.

Feature Image Credits: 

Avni Dhawan

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A demand to introduce Maithili as one of the languages offered by the University has been raised by a section of teachers from the University of Delhi.

This comes into light after the Delhi Government had announced the proposal of having Maithili as a subject for the students whose mother language is Maithili. It will be taught as an optional subject for classes 8 to 12 in Delhi schools.

In a letter addressed to the Vice Chancellor of the University, Prof. Yogesh Tyagi by Associate Professor Rajiv Kumar Verma  from Satyawati College, the latter puts forward various reasons for introducing Maithili as a part of the subjects offered by the University. 

He brings into light that during the academic session this year, Maithili Elective/Core were included in the language subjects. Further strengthening his stand, he said that the Union Public Service Commission (UPSC) also introduced Maithili as an optional paper in which many candidates have been successful. 

Mr. Verma has been a former Academic Council (AC) member. 

The action has been perceived as a welcome move throughout the University.

Mr. Rajesh Jha, a member of the University’s executive council quotes, “Maithili is spoken in areas of eastern Uttar Pradesh (UP) and Bihar. This year, around 50,000 students had applied from UP and 15,120 from Bihar for admission in DU.” 

As of now, the University of Delhi’s Department of Modern Indian Languages offers courses in languages such as Tamil, Telugu, Assamese, Bengali, Kannada and Gujarati amongst others but not in Maithili. 

It is therefore expected that having the language would grab the interest of a large number of students studying in the University.

Delhi University Student’s Union (DUSU) President Mr. Akshat Dahiya also said that the introduction of Maithili will be a great inclusionary step for the students from Purvanchal and encouraged the move. 

Feature Image Credits: DU Beat Archives.

Amrashree Mishra

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How many times have we rendezvoused at Rajiv Chowk with our opposite campus friends or clicked ourselves in the picturesque lanes of Connaught Place (CP)? Here is a story of appreciation for Central Delhi.

There have been more than a few instances of my friends and I wanting to go out together and have fun, and ending up at CP, which some of my friends call the ‘heart of Delhi’. This British architectural marketplace is a student’s favourite with cheap first-copy goods of Palika Bazaar, clothing and the accessory haven of Janpath, and fancy café lanes, there is a place for everyone to belong here. 

The complex-and-crowded-10-gate-Metro-Station of Rajiv Chowk lies centrally on the map of Delhi. It is an intersection between the two most crowded and heavily connected lines of the Delhi Metro – the Blue and Yellow lines. Hence, this becomes a perfect location to rendezvous with friends from different corners of Delhi. Shubhi Gupta, a student at Lady Shri Ram College, shares that meeting her friend from St. Stephen’s in the North Campus becomes easier at CP because it is equal travel for both of them.

The Central Park in CP sees several young couples venturing out and enjoying a simple yet romantic picnic date. In the evening, ice-cream vendors line up and bhelpuri sellers with balloon vendors create the vibe of a fair. Families come together to enjoy a peaceful evening here, and recently CP has even become a spot for extravagant wedding shoots.

Himanika Agarwal, a student at Gargi College calls CP wholesome in its appeal. She says, “It has fancy brands and top-notch expensive Italian cafes like H&M and Cafe Tonino along with the roadside chaat and rolls and cheap tops, denim, and bags from Janpath. You find the real Maybelline being sold at high prices on the ground and fake first copies being sold underground in Palika. Rajiv Chowk is a place for every mood.” 

Although, many complain of the crowd at Rajiv Chowk Metro Station and many even call CP a by-product of elitist and capitalistic tendencies of the society where Janpath and Palika become home to the struggling crowd while the lanes of CP remain pristine with its upper-class crowd. The seclusion becomes apparent despite it not being deliberate.

Feature Image Credits: Rishabh Chauhan for DU Beat

Sakshi Arora

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Fests seem to be a significant part of the whole college experience. And these fests are incomplete without a thrilling concert on stage. From sports fields to tour buses, several independent, signed, and Bollywood artists have toured the various colleges of India for their fests.

Here we count down five significant artists who are a popular sight at many a college concert. The following musicians and singers are featured in here in no particular order, just on the basis of genres and the space they have among the college-going youth. Many college fests take place over the course of two or three nights. The usual pattern is a rock band or a DJ making people jump for the early days, while playback singers from the film industry take over the final days.

  1. Electronic Dance Music (EDM)

Gurgaon-born DJ Zaeden is a popular pick of the new age electronic music producers. Zaeden has struck a chord with the youth, having performed at many colleges of University of Delhi (DU) and other technological institutes. Zaeden’s set usually features his originals like ‘Never Let You Go’, along with dance covers of Coldplay and Maroon 5 songs.

But if you want to hear remixes of mainstream film music, then DJ Chetas and NYK to a lesser extent could be your choice. Chetas’ rise is remarkable as his work might seem pretty mediocre in the face of new-age DJs like Ritviz and Mojo Jojo. Still, Chetas knows how to market himself. His career took off with making themed mashups of Bollywood songs that were featured on the 9X TV network; soon his mashups and remixes found their way in the fest circuit increasing his brand name.

Still, the most original music producer in this scene is Nucleya. With hardly any remixes, he cuts straight to the chase whipping out his classic trance tracks like ‘Bass Rani’ and ‘Laung Gavacha’. Sometimes, if colleges have enough funds, they can even call up foreign DJs to add to the star value. For instance, Quintino in his Indian tour leg even managed to perform his sets at IIT Kanpur and BITS Goa last year. In Delhi’s Sri Ram College of Commerce (SRCC) it was rumoured that this year, the mask-wearing DJ Marshmello or Alan Walker (another DJ who likes covering his face) would headline their fest. But these were just rumours, as in the end, it was DJ Chetas who performed.

  1. Acoustic/ Rock

When it comes to light acoustic vibes, Prateek Kuhad is the top pick. Featuring a three-piece band, he smoothly sings and plays his guitar while the audiences just swoon. A critically acclaimed songwriter, his track list has both English and Hindi tunes, usually with slow instruments and themes of love and life. With most of his followers being millennials, it’s only apt for the ‘Cold Mess’ singer to be a sensation at college fests.

But when it comes to rock, there’s an even bigger force to be reckoned with—a band called The Local Train. The rock band is a recent phenomenon that started out with their first record ‘Aalas ka Ped’, an instant hit amongst a modest fanbase. Two albums old, they are touring all over the country performing in nearly every Hard Rock Café, and nearly every college fest. Churning out songs in a mix of Hindi and Urdu, their tracks like ‘Khudi’ and ‘Aaoge Tum Kabhi’ deal with various themes like following your dreams and waiting for a lover; stuff which appeals to the dreamy college kid. It’s safe to say that The Local Train is not so ‘local’ anymore!

  1. Film music

This is where the fest gets fully mainstream. Bollywood artists usually have many singles from film’s soundtracks, which make for popular music content for the fest audiences. Duos like Vishal-Shekhar and Saleem-Sulaiman are big hits in this regard.

Then there are popular Punjabi artists too in fest line-ups, like Diljit Dosanjh and Guru Randhawa. They sing originals as well as songs featured in films. While the background musicians manage the performance, and the singers’ bravado gets the crowds jumping, some do not consider them as true performers. A case in point is Diljit’s concert at Rendezvous (the annual fest of IIT Delhi), where many fans noted how the singer was lip-syncing for most of his songs.

Then there are a few other artists who manage to perform a varied set of both film and independent content. Farhan Akhtar assisted by his band Farhan Live! starts off his fest shows with songs from his popular films, Rock On and Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara; adding in ballads from albums of his own. Assamese Bollywood singer Papon (who recently performed at Hindu College on top of a Red Bull tour bus) also manages to play a few non-film tunes. Amit Trivedi has also sung his MTV Coke Studio songs for many a college fest. On a side note, Amit Trivedi’s concerts are truly a team effort. He not only introduces all his background singers and musicians to the audience but sometimes gives them the stage to perform their exclusive pieces.

Featured Image Credits: Aakarsh Gupta for DU Beat

Shaurya Singh Thapa

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A critique on the criticisms of memes, shows and books about nothing.

In his widely renowned book ‘Shows About Nothing: Nihilism in Popular Culture’, Thomas Hibbis talks about how nihilism: an absence of belief in anything, has seeped into popular culture. Shows like Rick and Morty, movies like Fight Club and Pulp Fiction, suicide memes or people eating Tide Pods: all have an underlying intersectionality that says God isn’t real and life is meaningless. Not to be confused with atheism, nihilists believe that we are just spiritless inhabitants of a purposeless world.

People have tried to label this as something extremely regrettable, and blame the glamourisation of popular culture of a growing sense of disconnect and absurd existentialism among young people. Then again, most people who think so are also writing articles about how millennials are killing the movie business.

The truth is that at a point in time where education is rising, and students aren’t just passive absorbers of static knowledge, we are thinking about things. Most of us live privileged lives, and when we don’t have to worry about having a roof over our head or 4 square meals a day, existentialism creeps up. Why am I here? What can I do to make in impact? How do I ensure people remember me?For so long religion and philosophy have tried to answer these questions, and failed. Religion is riddled with dogma and restriction, Philosophy offers no solace simply because it’s too time consuming and needs in depth knowledge.

But why has this curiosity converted into a lack thereof: an acceptance that there are no answers? This is where I tell you that nihilism isn’t necessarily stagnating or negative. There have been a range of Ted Talks on a school of thought called Optimistic Nihilism recently, allow me to simplify. Understanding that the universe is too big to care about whether or not you eat that sugar loaded pastry, bunk that lecture, or finally confess to your crush, can be a good thing. If we have no predetermined purpose, if God doesn’t have a naughty and nice list, it means that we get to dictate our purpose. In other words, if life means nothing, I get to decide what MY life will mean. When I realize that I am responsible for everything I do, and am in control of what I do and why I do it, I live by certain guiding principles and I value my morality.

As millennials and Generation Z, the system has failed us. The American Dream is a lie, and we know that most of us are going to end up average, even our class topper with a perfect 10 CGPA. But average isn’t all that bad when you stop comparing yourself to Gandhi and take control of your thoughts. If you’re reading this article on your phone, you’re educated, you have basic facilities and life is good. You don’t have to be stuck in planning for the future, you can value your education, obsess about the perfect cup of Chai and cherish your student days. More so, keep up the meme making and pick shows like Rick and Morty over the same old uni dimensional F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

Feature Image Credits – Twitter

Nikita Bhatia
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Dear Mr. Modi,

I had been lounging at my master’s feet while he read the newspaper this morning when I heard him softly chuckle to himself and mention the word ‘cleanse.’ My ears shot up in anticipation and I wagged my tail at the thought of the word ‘clean.’ A dog likes clean surroundings too, you see. All that garbage I see lying on the road when I’m taken for a walk, makes me want to throw up my chicken and bones. I like to sniff the clean breeze and feel rejuvenated every once in a while, except the pollution does not permit me this simple luxury.

You can imagine my distress when my master explained to his daughter that the ‘pollution’ that you and the RSS, working together, wanted to cleanse India of, is western culture. My tail settled back down with a thump and I shut my eyes, listening to the conversation with a weariness. School curricula, art and cinema, science and technology and libraries must be cleansed of western influence. Oh, heavy heart! What if everybody begins to speak in Sanskrit, now? I’m quite the western dog, you know, English is the only language I understand. Will the little baby of the house not be able to study American and European and Russian history? It could possibly make her a little less Indian. Ban that Leonardo da Vinci’s paintings from every household and public space. Listen to his name, so un-Indian! And what about that other Leonardo? Di Caprio, was it? He’s quite a good looker that man. My tail droops at the thought of not being able to watch his movies. All this is too much for me to digest.

Somebody must knock some sense into these human beings. How will you communicate with each other and with us dogs without a common language, may I ask? And, what is that sation you keep talking about? Globalisation, yes. The world is one place. Sharper divisions along boundaries and repeated assertions of national identity can only prove harmful to integration with the larger world out there. I have learnt to coexist with that St.Bernard across the road. We even nod at each other occasionally. Why cannot humans live with other cultures apart from their own? We are a global community. As we constantly interact with each other across the globe, parts of different cultures are bound to quietly seep into our own, and this is something to be proud of. For instance, the German Shepherd in the neighbour’s house has taught me how to rid myself of ticks and flees. Quite useful, I thought. Whatever happened to other, more important words like global warming, poverty and inflation? I always assumed they were weightier words than ‘western culture.’

Besides, culture is a social construct. It isn’t something that is unnaturally imposed on society. Rather, it develops gradually, resulting from the historical and socio-economic processes that the country is subject to. You cannot forcefully straighten a dog’s tail, can you?



Your neighbourhood dog.


Abhinaya Harigovind

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On the 1st of March, 2014, Pt Birju Maharaj Parampara organized an evening of Kathak titled Nritydhara, with choicest of productions of Pt Jai Kishen Maharaj ji being performed.

The event took place at Stein Auditorium, India Habitat Centre and saw an amalgamation of an august gathering, with the presence of acclaimed artists such as Padma Bhushan Rajan- Sajan Mishra ji, Deepak Maharaj ji.

The first performance was Pt Jai Kishen Maharaj Ji’s most recent production titled “Chidiya ki Udaan”, the words to which were lend by acclaimed poet Ashok Chakradhar. The piece describes the journey of a bird from infancy to adulthood, as she faces the difficulties of life. The music is light and melodious, but at the same time does not compromise on the technical aspect of dance. Replete with the sounds of fluttering of feathers and chirping of birds, it shows the complete dominance of doyen Pt Jai Kishen maharaj ji, as far as creative choreography in contemporary times is concerned.

The second item was called “Thumri Maalika” and it was a compilation of old thumris of the lucknow gharana, composed by Pt Bindadin maharaj ji, one of the founders of the ancient Kalka-Bindadin Lucknow Gharana of Kathak.

289 kathak HS 010314

Followed suit was a solo performance by Tribhuwan Maharaj, son of Pt Jai Kishen Maharaj and grandson of Pt Birju Maharaj ji. Accompanying him on padhant were his father himself and the what the audience witnessed was an electrifying combination of padhant and dancing. Tribhuwan was in his full form and performed a carefully selected series of pieces that left the audience wanting for more.

The final performance was titled “swarangtaal”, depicting the union of swar and taal to subsequently form music. The beginning showed 6 girls as swar, dancing to abstract music, followed by 4 boys dancing to the pure beats sans melody. An interaction between a girl and boy brings swar and taal together and in the finale everyone comes together to dance to the music, complete with swar and taal.

If there is one institution that people see as something that is truly beyond reproach and has the integrity to do what is right, it is the Supreme Court. The hallowed chambers of this court are a place where the right to equality is truly sacrosanct. In light of the media spectacle surrounding the verdict on Section 377 and the condemnation of the entire world that accused the Supreme Court of being out of date, the court decided to answer its critics. The SC has decided to do away with standards of reasonable doubt and remove conventional defenses such as self defense and the insanity plea. In the spirit of equality however it has decided to impose these on everyone equally. The court believes that this move ensures that nobody can now claim that the moves of the court were illegal or against the notion of equality.

1)      The ‘it is not natural’ defence

The idea that anything or anyone unnatural go scot-free is something that the courts are not okay with. Hence they have decided to crack down on all those who defy natural and stray from the natural order. Under this, all individuals with hearing aids, prosthetic limbs, wheelchairs, breast implants and artificial joints can now be prosecuted. This is a bold move that ensures that individuals do what is natural and avoid any sort of deviant behaviour.

2)      The ‘it is against our culture’ defence

The SC believes that we must hold our culture on the highest possible pedestal and the law must take the backseat. With the cultural fabric of this nation withering away and the youth getting drawn to the ways of the west, the courts decided to take a stand. So people can now be held criminally liable for listening English music, going to modern hospitals rather than babas who practice ayurveda, not wearing ghoonghat or putting sindoor and commiting any other act that is not compatible with Indian culture.

3)      The ‘Baba Ramdev said it’ plea

This in essence is the replacement for the ‘Insanity Plea’. It’s not just limited to Baba Ramdev, rather all Yoga teachers turned moral experts turned political activist preachings are admissible in a court of law as evidence.  In accordance with this all schools shall no longer be teaching sex education, rather Yoga education is going to be the way forward. As per this law everything any baba says is true and sacrosanct and forms the fabric of our otherwise immoral society. As a result of this plea, Asaram Bapu and his son have just been released from jail. Also the system of community service has now been removed and all homosexuals can go to Baba Ramdev who claims to have found the cure for this deviant behaviour.

4)      The ‘religion’ appeal

The SC believes in equality and upholds the idea of secularism. In keeping with this spirit the SC decided to bring back the ancient religious laws. The first step was a historic one and ensures that all atheists are now criminals that can be imprisoned for life. All views that defy religion like abortion, use of condoms, committing one of the seven sins and many other such views are now regarded as illicit and criminal views that go against the state. Also the punishment for these acts will be decided by religious leaders and not the SC , so sharia law, crucifixion, sati are now all fair play.

5)      The ‘it is a disease’ defence

Many opponents of the LGBT community felt that not being straight is a disease and hence it should be criminalized. So in keeping with the court’s strong belief in equality it has decided to criminalize all people that are sick. Basically all individuals that are disabled or terminally ill can now be sent to jail.

These moves by the courts will surely make a statement. The SC also felt that people are actually getting more offended by the tag of being called a Criminal. They feel that many great leaders are criminals in this country and they continue to live their life normally. So why is the LGBT community getting so offended by the criminal tag. It’s time that they take inspiration from the many criminals of this nation like Salman Khan and live life to the fullest because all men are equal in the eyes of the law, even criminals.

Editor’s note: Bazinga is DU Beat’s fake news column. This piece is supposed to be a satire and is not aimed at offending supporters of the LGBT community. If in case you are not a supporter,  it was surely written to offend you.