<![CDATA[An unpopular opinion- Kabir Singh was very informative, it taught us some lessons, a few dos and mostly don’ts for this Valentine’s. Note them down, and you are good to go. 1. Do not name your dog after your ex Do not have the same name for your pet and your ex, if things patch up, it might get awkward and confusing. You are lying if you did not want to find out how things would be after Kabir, Preeti and Preeti- the dog got together. There would be absolute confusion! Imagine Kabir calling Preeti upstairs for some quality time but ends up getting licked by a dog. (PETA approves that love story) 2. C O N S E N T Ask them before you ‘shower your affection’. They might not want to be the ‘lucky’ receivers and you might receive a slap, cuss words, or a flying footwear. Hey Kabir, remember when you got agitated when that guy harassed Preeti? Well, you are no less! Ask your “kisne touch kia?” (who touched her?) question while looking in the mirror. Preeti had poker face on while Kabir kissed her on the cheek. That’s the opposite of romantic 3. Do not stare that creepily, even background music will not help Do not stare creepily at a person you have feelings for, it will make them uncomfortable and no amount of soothing music can nullify that. And it’s even more uncomfortable if you are the senior and both of you are in a premier ragging institution. 4. “Meri bandi” (my girl) logic does not exist Slave trade had been abolished long ago, so it might get difficult to acquire ownership over a human. Kabir might not know about it, but that does not mean we did not tell you. If you like someone, don’t scare her coevals by saying, “she is mine, you can have any other”, that’s not appropriate, because this literally is not a fish market, or even a flea market for that matter. If you like someone, tell them how you feel about them. Simple. 5. Do not force her to be friends with random humans You do not have to introduce them to the permutation and combination of friendship. So do not force friendship, especially with the “pretty chick- healthy chick” motto, that is absurd. 6. Let her study on her own If they are rank-holders, they can find their way out. Trust us. Do not take her to secluded areas or draw on their hands (especially if they live in a hostel with water scarcity) it is scary and irritating. Especially for all the competitive Monicas- if they end up getting more marks than you, you will only feel bad and not in love. 7. Private space is irrelevant in India No matter how much you try to explain the concept of Private Space, or introduce the concept of right angles or age phenomenon, India will not understand that easily. Especially, if the intruders to your private space are your parents, please do get a room. 8. Do not slap each other If one of you raises your voice while talking about a difference in opinion, it is advised to inform your partner about the same, do not slap. Secondly, if your partner cannot muster courage to tell their parents about your relationship, do not slap. Thirdly, just do not slap, that is physical violence. If you are a single soul, be thankful, it is better to be alone than in an abusive Kabir’s company. Preeti agrees on this. Happy Valentine’s! Feature Image Credits: @deewar_ Priyanshi Banerjee [email protected] ]]>
Journalism has been called the “first rough draft of history”. D.U.B may be termed as the first rough draft of DU history. Freedom to Express.
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