DUB Speak

Things not to do in your 20s

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This is not going to be a listicle where five things are clearly demarcated as the do’s and don’ts of your 20s because let’s be honest, reality is never only black and white and everything cannot be reduced down to points. This is especially the case when you enter your 20s where one makes many revelations. Revelations such as only working hard in 12th standard does not guarantee an easier life, careers are not always pre-decided, friends go out of touch, and… Well, I am sure you get the point.

But, however much we stumble while taking decisions and figuring out what’s the right thing to do, we, very deeply, and almost aggressively are sure about the importance of success, especially in our 20s. We want immediate success in examinations, careers, relationships, friendships. It is almost like we over rate success. Yes, I said it. And No, I am not crazy.  I know how it sounds. A friend of mine doing law from country’s top law university and working on a start-up first said to me, “Nishita, we overrate success.” And I wanted to shout,” Yes hypocrite, sure as hell you aren’t aspiring for success!”  But then aspiring for it to make your life better and making it the only option to make your life better are two extremely different things.

Our society has constructed milestones for us and we are expected to be achieving them by their corresponding age like job by 23, marriage by 26. We invariably become a part of this unspoken race to get the best job, the best placement, the best bride/groom even if we didn’t sign up for it. It is almost like our individuality is ignored and we are asked to fit a fabricated prototype. Why? Because, it is familiar and convenient. If I say your 20s are the time to explore everything, you might say it is the time to work on your career and then settle down but can the latter really be achieved before experiencing the former?

Your 20s are not the time to submit and let a third person burden you with their expectations. I read on Quora once that we all think life is not turning out like it was supposed to but success isn’t like a Domino’s Pizza Delivery that will reach you within thirty minutes. It takes plenty of time and it is okay. Your idea of success isn’t supposed to match someone else’s idea. So, take a deep breath, and don’t expect the arrival of success to solve every issue in your life. There is a Sharma jee ka beta doing MBA from Amreeka in everyone’s life which makes them quiver under pressure, but the trick is to be patient and not over rate success.


Nishita Agarwal

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Image Credits: http://www.kenlagasse.ca/

[email protected] A IInd year English(H) student from Daulat Ram College, whose idea of a perfect day is seeing herself coiled up in bed with an interesting book and strong coffee. A huge believer in binge-watching, she is currently following a plethora of series ranging from How to Get Away With Murder to Brooklyn Nine-Nine. She can be found in the amphitheater of the college, sharing her love for debating with fellow members of the society. Known for her great sense of humor, she works everyday to overcome the only fear she has, the fear of remaining mediocre.

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