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Q. Dear Amma, my boyfriend and I have been going out for over a year now and things have been great. But being in my final year, I’m planning to leave the city soon and I am not interested in a long distance relationship. Though there is still 6 month’s time before I go, I am faced with the dilemma of leaving him now. What should I do?

My over boiled idli, take a deep relaxing breath and calm yourself. Such matters of heart cannot be mulled over in haste!

Amma always advices young macchis, such as you, caution in matters of the heart. Lovely macchi, the solution to your problem can’t come from anywhere else but your own heart. You need to think with a calm mind about what you want in your life, and no matter the decision you make, you should always be prepared to face the consequences.

If it is in your heart to leave, then you do not have any obligation to stay. But if after reflection, you think that this is not the right time and you don’t want to spend time apart till the time you have to ultimately leave, then you have Amma’s blessing.

Ultimately, it needs to be your decision and you need to think it through. Don’t take a lot of pressure and just follow your heart.

 

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Q. Hi Sex Amma, I’ve been with my girlfriend for 10 months now and we’ve barely hit third base. I understand that she wants to take it slow and I don’t want to pressurize her, but of late, the frequency is decreasing!

A: Oh my dear uttapam, Amma knows the plague that infests the minds of men in this country. Hitting the third base in a cricket crazy nation is all that men want, ignoring the weather and pitch conditions, thus getting out on the very first ball or eventually getting forced to play defensive.

Amma appreciates the fact that you understand that your macchhi wants to take it slow. The decreasing frequency suggests that the macchhi is either feeling guilty or has gotten scared due to the misunderstandings and taboo that accompany sex in our beloved nation. In any case, the solution is: communication.

You need to sit her down in an environment where she can speak to you about anything. And, if it’s a biological reason, then be a strong fisherman, be there for your macchhi and support her through the tough time. Build a strong bridge of communication and trust, and Amma guarantees you’ll start scoring again, singles and doubles at first, of course. Don’t lose your patience, else you’ll misjudge the ball and will be ‘caught’ out.

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