Amma, the guy I loved for the last two years just came out to me that he’s gay. I’m devastated. How do I deal with it?
It’s not his being gay that has got your Saree in a twist; it’s that his coming out was the thing that made clear that your fantasy has nothing to do with his or your reality. It is that you wanted something that he just didn’t and doesn’t-if there was any other reason it probably wouldn’t have hurt any less.
You haven’t lost anything, my sweet appam. He’s told you he is gay, so you need to work on isn’t approving or disapproving that, but accepting it. I’d also suggest accepting that even if he were straight, it doesn’t mean he would want what you want. There are a host of ways in which a person can be unavailable. Just because someone desires us doesn’t mean we share those same desires, even if we’re capable of it. As filmy as this sounds, your Amma is here to gently pat you on the head and tell you that the only thing you can do in such a scenario is to accept him the way he is and move on.
Have a query? But don’t know who to ask? Mail your queries to Sex Amma at [email protected].
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