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August 7, 2012

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Picture source: hostels247

The students of a boarding school in North Delhi were in for a surprise this Monday when a group of monkeys decided to settle down on the third floor of the boys’ hostel. The students residing in the same building claim that the monkeys had driven out the earlier occupants living on that floor. Incidentally, the floor was occupied by a group of students who caused a lot of inconvenience to their neighbours by partying with loud music at ungodly hours in the night and driving around the campus at high speeds, despite strict rules against the possession of personal vehicles.

When the displaced students were asked to comment, the only response they had to offer was a furious scratching of their heads, while one of them went to the extent of stuffing 5 bananas into his mouth in one go. According to the one of resident teachers, who also happens to be a part-time veterinarian, the monkeys are descendants from a certain clan called ‘Magica Lemuria’ that belongs to the lost enchanted forests of Enid. He claimed that this could be predicted by the length of their fingernails, the peace sign tattooed on their thigh and the way they lick the fur on their head into a particular shape, consisting of a sideways parting. As for the rest of the student community, the relief in the air is palpable as they now enjoy an undisturbed sleep, occasionally broken by the sound of branches breaking and clothes falling from a height.

Vishnu: Hey!
Urvi: Hello there!
Vishnu: So what’s happening around University these days?
Urvi: Actually, quite a bit has been happening around DU these days.
Vishnu: Really? Tell me about these sundry happenings across University.
Urvi: Well, for starters, freshers have come in; examination results have not received the typical brouhaha that is normally associated with them; and the election campaigning has gone into an overdrive.
Vishnu: And then there are the myriad colleges getting repainted, renovated, decking up their buildings. It’s a rebirthing of sorts, come to think of it.
Urvi: Exactly. So when you think about it, a lot has been happening in DU these days.
Vishnu: But someone has been forgetting washrooms, you know.
Urvi: Specially the girls’ washrooms. Some of them are quite abysmal, really. One can’t possibly enter them without visibly cringing.
Vishnu: I think it’s time someone at least stopped turning a blind eye to all that goes wrong on campus and takes proactive measures to curb such happenings and indeed better the quality of life for students at the Varsity. One needs to look back only to the year gone by and they would recollect the many protests and immolations regarding the issue of the Tibetan students. And that is but only one of the issues that shook DU and rattled many. And then there was the great ordeal by semesterization which had stymied the pedagogues and their pupils almost alike, furor over which was only short-lived and barely skimmed the surface of the issue. This of course was succeeded by one of the worst scams in the history of the University as marks of the first batch of semester students were said to inflated by percentages as high as 13.
Urvi: Furthermore, in a futile attempt to restore peace and order, DU then proceeded to veil the contentious issue of the inflated semester results by removing them entirely from public eye. Obviously the scheme backfired. In fact, it added fuel to fire and instead of nipping the discontent in the bud, it has led to cold displeasure which isn’t any less lethal. It almost seems as if DU thrives on the flak it receives.
Vishnu: You could not have spoken a truer word, I say. There is a good deal to be hashed out about the happenings in this premier of Universities of the country. But where is the voice given to the people, to the students is the question that leaps to the mind readily.
Urvi: On paper, the system is almost Utopian. But then, when one reads the fine print, there is almost a tangible weight of wrongdoing in the air. Take for instance the exorbitant amount charged for getting an exam paper re-evaluated. If that is not blatant discouragement from seeking information, then I don’t know what is! This entire charade makes the transparency measures look hypocritical in the extreme.
Vishnu: Coupled with this is the rather readiness of the students and indeed the multitudes of others concerned when the time comes to act for their own rights, their freedom to expression, and even their own security. A Wodehousean state of idyllic bliss encapsulates these otherwise always attentive neo-activists, and they seem to be lulled into inaction as if mesmerized by the mercurial Pied Piper himself.
Urvi: Well, we have the power to make the flaws public. We’ll lay the bare facts before all and sundry. Let the bureaucracy play defense for as long as it can. The discontentment shall eventually overpower. To make or mar, the ball is in their court now.