Sexual desire


Masturbaration is something which Amma believes to be an act of providing a proof for self sufficiency and comfort within yourself, is often equivalent to a mystery for many lovely idlis out there, if you’re one of them don’t worry, Amma is here to spice up your curry.

So, my Idli before diving into details, let me tell you that the myths and taboos attached to female masturbaration hold no relevance in real life. Therefore, have nothing to fear and get ready to explore a new world residing amidst your own body. Just like before the preparation of a dosa, knowing the proper recipe is crucial, in a similar way a proper knowledge about your pleasure parts before you interact with them is very important. So, my idli there are majorly two parts – A) Clitoris, a bean shaped part with the sole purpose of providing erotic pleasure, and B) Vagina, a muscular opening and closing between the cervix and the external opening.

Since now you are well versed with the hidden wonders of your body, it’s time for you to understand their utilisation for seeking the ultimate sensual experience. So, my lovely idli when it’s masturbaration, consider your lady fingers your best friends, trust me they can do some really amazing stuff. Using the tips of your fingers to rub and gently circle around your clit, or using your fingers like a scissor putting each one on the outer side of your labia, increasing and decreasing its pressure works wonderfully for some. The understanding of the technique that works the best for you comes with experimentation and experience.

There are some who like their sambhar spicy for them, amma suggests of using sex toys. There are a variety of sex toys available in the market ranging from dildos to fluorescent colored vibrators, detailed information of which Amma has already provided in one of her previous articles. However, if you are a beginner, it’s better to be organic and use your fingers. One of the very important reasons behind Amma’s infinite love for masturbaration is the complete control one gets to experience in it and since, it’s your own body you know how long and what exactly will make you perceive what you are dying to experience.

So, my beloved idlis it’s time to shift the control in your hands and experience your world of fantasy.

(For more sex related queries, write to [email protected])

Sex Amma 

[email protected]

Dear Amma,

In my 19 years of life, I haven’t really had sexual feelings for anyone. I don’t even feel like being particularly romantic with anyone. Does this make me incapable of love?


Dear Macchi

First of all, what you’re feeling right now is perfectly normal and it definitely does not make you incapable of love. It isn’t necessary for you to be sexually or even romantically attracted towards anyone. I hope you’re acquainted with the concept of “Asexuality”. It is a sexual orientation which basically signifies a lack of sexual attraction towards others. Within this asexuality spectrum fall the “aromantics” or “aros”. An aro refers to any individual who experiences little or no romantic attraction.

Now that I have familiarised you to these sexual identities, let us come back to your problem. Not being able to feel sexually or romantically for another individual doesn’t mean you cannot love them at all. We all feel platonic and familial love for those who really matter to us, be it our friends or our family.

I understand, my little idli, that when you look around at people falling in love, it might appear all beautiful and delightful. You may feel afraid or worried that you may never experience that happiness and might just feel a little left out. But I want you to understand that romantic love isn’t everything. It is often considered that romantic love is a level following platonic love. But, I believe they’re just two different kinds of love that are equally powerful in their respective spectrums.

So instead of viewing romance as something better than platonic love, try perceiving the two as equal. Try channeling your energy, that one would put into a romantic relationship, towards your platonic relationships. Embrace your friendships, dear chutney, and love your friends with the power they deserve. Because at the end of the day, love is love, be it someone you have sex with or someone who had sex and came to you first to talk about it.

I will leave you with my final suggestion. Try to not box yourself under any one identity. Feel free to explore and do not shy away from new experiences. After all, life is short and love is for everyone!

Sex Amma

[email protected]