Sex Amma

Sex Amma: Is spanking normal?

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Hi Amma.

My boyfriend likes spanking me and I feel that certain things he does are extremely porn influenced.  Is spanking normal?  Is it okay to sometimes let him have his way because as partners we have to satisfy each other?

Little idli, ‘normal’ is a very subjective word when it comes to preferences and tastes, more so while doing the deed. What is completely normal for one couple, might be unthinkable for another!

Amma, as you know, has had her fair share of dosas though, so I can say that spanking is not too kinky. It is common, though it is not everyone’s cup of rasam,

If you’re worried about your boyfriend’s desires being too influenced by porn, I would advise you not to think too much of it unless he’s unable to draw a line and fails to understand that you might be uncomfortable with certain things. And yes, while a relationship does involve satisfying each other, you should not feel as though it’s something you HAVE to do if it’s not something you enjoy.

Does your boyfriend know about your thoughts on this? A lot of times your partner might be doing certain things because he thinks you enjoy it. If you let him believe that you’re into spanking even though you aren’t, then you can’t really expect him to be a mind reader. As always, communication is key. However, if you have mixed feelings about spanking and aren’t really averse to it, then you can indulge him once in a while.

Providing guidance to the students of DU since 2008 on matters of sex, dating and intimacy, Amma is back again this week with her dose of advice. Want to ask Amma a query? Mail it to [email protected].

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