A
ries
Stay away from apples this week. Also avoid rice, cake, onions and meat. Best to just fast, actually.
Taurus
Beware!! Avoid wearing yellow pants; the person sitting beside you will also be wearing the same.
Gemini
Geminis will buy lots of insulin syringes for diabetic aunts, even when neither of their parents have sisters.
Cancer
Next time you travel by the metro, you will be stuck in the same coach as a loud, whiny kid. Oh, and you’ll forget your earphones at home.
Leo
Finally you will be able to say “it’s a dream come true thing”, when your Facebook profile picture will get the highest likes amongst your friends.
Virgo
Hurray!! You are the one who is going to make all decisions for date with your partner. So chill, you can finally take him/ her to Golu Chaat Bhandaar.
Libra
Born salespeople, overflowing with the gift of eloquence, they could sell a fur coat to King Kong in the middle of summer, convincing him of evening frost.
Scorpio
There isn’t much romance this week. Oh please, my crustaceous, yet bodacious, Crab! Read a novel! Romance went out with fuzzy dice and Clackers.
Sagittarius
You are mostly to get a part time job or an internship where you can fill your pockets a bit and obviously celebrate your weekend without any tension for your pocket money.
Capricorn
Any wrong statement about them may stir a storm in a teacup. Try avoiding conversations with these people. They may turn wild anytime, anywhere.
Aquarius
Who knows…maybe you enjoy wearing blame proudly? And also your home will be full of unwanted guests.
Pisces
Your hard drive will crash and you’ll lose all the episodes of that TV show you’ve been meaning to watch. You’ll lose your other ‘videos’ too.
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