Love and infatuation, in the beginning, feel like the same emotion, which leads to many complications.
You are walking in the corridor with your friends and suddenly, your gaze falls on that cute guy standing next to the pillar with not within a group of friends, and your world trembles. As filmy as it sounds, this actually happens with many of us. Another day, you are sitting in that boring lecture while the professor is hurling out his discourse, and all of a sudden you happen to rest your eyes on that sweet girl you’ve already given your heart to as she flicks her hair and refocuses her attention to the lecture and it makes you wonder if the drop in your stomach is a symptom of love.
Whether you have just come into college or have spent here a couple of years already, it doesn’t really matter, what matters are your feelings. They may develop anytime – on the first day of college or much time after you’ve already graduated. What is important here, is to develop the capability to determine whether what you feel is love or simple infatuation. Love is a magical sensation. It works on a level that lies way beyond the physical motives. Hence, if what you feel is a physical thirst, then, my friend, I’m gonna stop you right there. It’s lust. As a feeling, to love and to be loved is one of the best feelings on this universe. The simple realisation that there is someone in this life who means more than anything else to you, and that the feeling is mutual, is enough to lift your mood, no matter how upset you are.
Infatuation, on the other hand, is a fancy term for the physical attraction that occurs at regular intervals. Thus, when
we fall for someone over a feature like their “cute smile” or that “beautiful face”, there is a fair chance it is merely
infatuation. When you’re in love, you do crave the physical presence of your beloved but it is not as intense as in the case of infatuation. There’s a saying that “If you love someone, let them go. If they return, they’re yours, if they don’t, they never were”. Infatuation, on the other hand, being the physical attraction that it is, has got little to do with feelings. Love is longer and much more comfortable, while infatuation is intense and short-lived. Thus, that rush of adrenaline when you look at your crush is most probably infatuation, for when you’re in love, you feel comfortable in the presence of your lover, and not shaky. Also, note here that infatuation makes our thought process a bit more irrational. In this perspective, “chaand-taare tod lana” (getting someone the moon and stars), sounds a bit resonating with infatuation, isn’t it? If what you’re devoting most of your thought to is your crush, it means that you’re obsessed with the person, which is a clear sign of infatuation. This stand gets further established if there’s an eruption of jealousy if you look at your crush diverting their attention to someone other than you, for true love is understanding and full of trust.
Love always grows with friendship. If you find yourself comfortable and friendly with the person you think is your “lover”, it is a sign of being in a healthy relationship. However, if your desire for the person makes you want them more and more, you’re headed to a dead end. There are chances that what you’re feeling is infatuation,
rather than love. Thus, the outcome is that there exists a very thin line of demarcation between love and infatuation, but this thin line carries the potential to make or break a relationship. If what you feel for your better-half is physical, immature, materialistic, obsessive and mistrustful in nature, then it is pretty sure that you’re merely infatuated rather than in love.
True love is a pure opposite of what one faces in infatuation. It is totally devoid of lust, immaturity, jealousy, obsession, and mistrust and offers growth, real happiness, and contentment.
Feature Image Credits: Karen Rosetzsky
Aashish Jain
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