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Bazinga: Antardhvani reinstated as Diwali fest, Trump and Hillary inspired crackers to be used for festivity

DUs new diktat making the Hindi Test compulsory to obtain a degree under CBCS doesnt consider the fact that a lot of its students are from non-Hindi speaking regions. In the midst of this linguistic drama (quite literally), the cultural festival of Antardhvani is back as a Diwali celebration, which too mandates following very Hindi rituals. Should education and festivity be labelled with a language? (Read our front page story for more context)

Former Vice Chancellor’s baby, ‘Antardhvani’, the annual cultural festival of the university, which was silenced after the end of his tenure, seems to have come back, as the current DU administration, instead of cancelling those festivities this year, has thought otherwise.

 

Known to spend extravagant amount of time and money on things like a pompous show of fake prestige and less time on charting out a meaningful syllabus for students, the ever so dynamic stakeholders of Delhi University have once again come forward to prove their metal, and this time, by revamping the Antardhvani celebrations under the garb of ‘Diwali’ festivities.

 

While the original purpose of the festival was to bring the university community together in a shared enterprise that celebrates creativity, talent, innovations, experiments, achievements and unique features of this large university, this year, Antardhvani 2.0 is going to be full of only ‘Diwali’ feels.

 

However, owing to its practice of deliberately squishing ‘Hindi’ in everything these days, like an average woman trying to squish her behind in the already jam packed seats of the Delhi Metro, the university has brought out a notice that mandates all celebrations to have a connection to Hindi.

 

Like Antardhvani was used as a tool to showcase the flamboyance of the FYUP system, Antardhvani 2.0 will focus on CBCS and throw some light on its achievements. Our insiders have informed us that while the whole celebration’s aim is to have a ‘university diwali mela’, the celebration will be directed by strict entry procedures.  A source, on condition of anonymity told us, “Entry would be strictly based on one’s ability to chant at least 4 lines of a bhajan, in hindi, at the entry gate. The dress code would be ethnic obviously. For couple entry, the pair will have to recite an impromptu chorus of a bhajan as asked by the sasnkari bouncers.”

 

Tired of seeing the Pakistan effigies burn, the organising committee has taken due care of laying a creative bent of mind to the whole fest. “Owing to the burring issues in the global scenario, our organising committee has decided to use US Presidential election inspired crackers. We are going to become the first university in the country or around the world, to burst ‘Hill-ladi’ and ‘Trump sutli bomb’, inspired by the traits of Hillary and Trump respectively.”

On asking about why a certain choice of crackers for a certain candidate, a member remarked, “The characteristics of a ladi are very familiar with that of Hillary. Like a ladi, she makes a lot of noise, may come across as a threat but once that noise dies down, it is all the same again. With Trump, he hands down qualifies as a sutli or thread bomb, as he can burst anywhere, anytime, pushes people to increase their guard and makes an annoying sound that forces people to cover their ears.”

 

Ps. Whatever cracker they may be, remember, both pollute :) Happy Diwali to all!

 

 

*Disclaimer: Bazinga is our weekly column of almost believable fake news. It is only to be appreciated, not accepted!

 

Riya Chhibber

riyac@dubeat.com



riyac@dubeat.com ; An avid debater, singer and horoscope freak, she is an eccentric Aquarian who loves two things: food and sarcasm. Studying Journalism at Kamala Nehru College, her interest in political debates and international affairs is immense. A cricket lover, she thinks her rebellious modus operandi can change the world! You can reach her at riyac@dubeat.com


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