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Sex Amma

Q. Amma I’m a 18 years old boy….. And I have too many problem. Like whenever I say any girl around me I feel like to do sex…. And all the time I think of sex. I want to get rid of this thing…

What will I do plzzzzzzzz help me……

 

A.  Aiyooo. Amma is completely exhausted after reading this question. It took Amma about half an hour to understand what this poor child had written and then to recover from this shocking usage of English. Clearly, English is one of your major problems.

After having finally figured out what you were trying to say, Amma has only one thing to say to you- Get a girl. Not forcefully, please. And preferably deaf, for only a few strong hearted souls in this world can take your roguish charm. And may Amma suggest that you never write her a love letter- it’s for your own good.

Now, there is no way you can get rid of sexual excitement. It’s a natural process. If, by a miracle, you are unable to find a girl, rely on your trusted right hand. It could not be put to a better use in your case. And, until then, wait for your parents to find you a nice, docile young girl who’d keep your urges under control.

 

Q. Hi amma, I’m a 27 year old guy. I’m sexually attracted towards my mom from the past 13 years. i want to have sex with her. how do i seduce her and make her agree to have sex with me? please reply.

A. And then again, there’s always a rotten idli who didn’t get the batter quite right. My little oedipus, there is no strategy in Amma’s  not-so-stringent moral code that allows you a romp with the mom. Incest sure sounds kinky, but let’s keep it to the movies. Let me guarantee you this, your mother does not feel that way about you, and probably never will. So suck in those desires and please spare your Amma. My advice would be to find a shrink as soon as you can. Trust me, after a few sessions of catharsis and psychoanalysis, you will emerge a brand new idli, probably shaped the right way this time.

 

You could mail Amma your queries at sexamma@dubeat.com 



Journalism has been called the “first rough draft of history”. D.U.B may be termed as the first rough draft of DU history. Freedom to Express.


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