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People at this moment are running against themselves in a pursuit of perfection. Does perfection even exists? How is this pursuit affecting you? Read on to know more.

We all aspire to be a better version of ourselves every day. Growth is an indispensable part of our lives and we must strive to enhance ourselves and keep adding new feathers in our wings. But for some, things don’t end just at personal growth for betterment. They are on a different race altogether, an endless pursuit- the pursuit of perfection. And, there exists a stark difference between the two.

When one is striving to grow to be better, they are fueled by motivation and inspiration but when one is driven to achieve the unattainable state of perfection, they are fueled by a state of discontentment, low self esteem and unrealistic expectation.

There are no two ways about the fact that perfection is a myth. It is a state of mind and cannot be achieved through any outer validation or achievement. It is imagined to be the state of flawlessness and completeness where nothing can possibly go wrong. This very imagination is enough to reaffirm the fact that this state is unachievable. If you are one amongst the people who are constantly hustling to achieve ‘perfection’, then sorry to burst the bubble but you aren’t getting there. You’re getting to a life of depression and discontentment from yourself, despite of all the efforts and hard work you put in.

The downsides of this pursuit of perfection doesn’t just end at it being a futile chase; it can have far worse implications. Studies define perfectionism as “a combination of excessively high personal standards and overly critical self-evaluations.” The very motivation to embark upon this pursuit is driven by a lack of self-esteem and unhappiness with one’s own self.

When one strives to become ‘perfect’, they become over critical of theirselves and indulge in the unhealthy practice of self-sabotaging. Even their most stellar achievements appear to be too less as compared to what more can be achieved.

We are constantly seeking more. This is a constant look out for something more amazing, more validating or more fulfilling.

And this cycle results in a persistent state of unhappiness where nothing or no one in life makes us joyous. As a result, in its worst consequences, it directly impacts our mental health. When one’s pursuit bears no fruit, they can get engulfed into anxiety or depression. This is alarming!

Advertisements feed upon this very insecurity and make us feel that something is missing in our lives. Social media is a worldview of perfection. It instigates within a person the idea that everyone around them is living a perfect life and makes them loathe their very existence. But it is important to remember that nobody lets their flawed self surface on the feed of Instagram without filtering it. It must be remembered at all times that actions such as posting vacation or party pictures or pictures of one’s expensive car or phone are no proof of them living a perfect life.

To liberate oneself from this futile pursuit of perfection, it is extremely essential to learn the art of acceptance. Acceptance of who you are, however flawed and far from being perfect. Also, it is pertinent to understand that this pursuit is robbing one of happiness and pushing them into an endless dungeon of self-loathe.

 

Shreya Agrawal

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Feature Image Credits- Scopio

“Guys, suggest a funny caption for my picture na!” What are some Instagram lies we are all guilty of?

Spontaneously Funny Captions

Yes, you did not send that picture to your three friends and ask for their advice on the caption. You’re just naturally funny.

But, after you sent the best pictures to your friends or sibling, to choose which one to post, the next thing you said was, “Okay, now suggest a caption.” Something funny or self-deprecating (or both at once) is the latest preference in the caption business. “Me looking at food like” or “find yourself someone who looks at you the way I look at food” are some captions we have all used or at least seen being used around us. The seemingly effortless jokes took the combined efforts of many.

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Food photography has become a common       display trend on Instagram. Image Credits: Damini Mehta

Food Porn

The image of that perfect cheesy pizza, that fancy breakfast at a hotel, that chocolatey heaven of a dessert making others crave is but one part of a carefully orchestrated effort, and is not practically real. What if we posted the pictures of what we actually ate? Imagine that greasy roti, with bharte ki sabzi, moongi ki dal, and achar.

This brings us to the second type of images we see. It has become extremely common to see people at restaurants clicking pictures of each meal. Food bloggers have made a profession and money out of this, cafes and bakeries are now marketing through this, celebrities are being paid for posting such images and unique food items (like the black ice-cream you saw at fests) are also becoming trends because of this. With Huji to help us, we can make any picture look aesthetic!

Image Credits: Shradha Dadhwal
Stories depicting a beautiful study table are often staged. Image Credits: Shradha Dadhwal

Exam Season Study Table

Beautiful handwritten notes, pens kept diagonally on the notebook, and colourful stationery – the picture showing 3 A.M. is given the perfect touch with a cup of coffee (seconds before we have an emotional breakdown because so many chapters are left).

As exams get closer and sleep schedules worsen each day, we see more of these late-night study table pictures, with colourful pens, sticky notes, ear-plugs among other things. In reality, no one studies that way; majority of the kids are too flustered a night before exams and simply mug everything. Handwritten notes begin and end on the first day of college; the actual notes are shamelessly saved in our photo galleries. The coffee also gets cold by the time you click this picture.

Throwback Picture

When you could not post too many pictures from the one day you got good pictures, your friend suggested, “Yaar, #tbt karke daal dena (Friend, post it using #throwbacktime later.)”

Let us be honest here: it was that one day when you not only wore a great outfit but also your friend was clicking “Insta-worthy” pictures for you. So, you went home and sat down to choose what to post but even after one story, there were two pictures you just could not choose from! You simply let a few days go by, added a throwback (tb) caption like “tb to good hair day” or “tb to when college life was not a mess”, and posted the next one.

Side Profile

Look at you- standing in front of a wall or a bush of bougainvillea looking towards your side (whichever profile is best, of course).

The trend of selfies and smiling straight at the camera is gone and even feels self-centred; the trend of side profile in front of a view is on the rise! Let me paint you a word picture: you looking side-wards or glancing at something perfectly intensely, when your jawline is looking fine, and it seems like you totally did not intend on getting a picture. Other variants include fixing hair, fixing pallu or tie for farewell pictures, couples smiling at each other, etc.

Candid Laughter

No one:

Person in the picture: starts laughing

Things get funnier when people are getting pictures, and their pictures come out with this almost-candid laugh. We see this almost every day, especially in group pictures. The words ‘candid’ and the oxymoronic ‘staged candid’ are now used synonymously with pictures, where people say, “I want a candid there!” This trend is super common and here to stay.

Featured Image Source: Instagram

Shivani Dadhwal

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Everyday magazines, TV shows, celebrities and the entire fashion industry sell us the idea of the perfect body. Who decided what was the “perfect” body? And when did we start shaming others for not fitting in a size?

Two years ago, the “perfect” body consisted of a thigh gap; however, currently in 2017, being “thick” is the new “perfect” and thigh gaps are looked down upon. The rules of fashion change every week and it is hard to keep up – but it isn’t hard to ignore. We usually don’t see what happens after that. With the rules of fashion, the definition of the “perfect” body also changes and with that, comes the eating disorders, the insecurities and self-hate, the suicidal tendencies, and body-shaming. “You can’t wear that,” “This doesn’t suit your body type,” are just some things we hear, and say, on a regular basis. “You have lost weight,” is synonymous with “You look better than before,” and it is taken as a compliment instead of a concern like it should be – but what was the problem with that extra weight before?

And it isn’t just about the extra weight, it is also about the lack of it, the incorrect placement of it, the exact number on the scale, and the relation of that to one’s beauty, that makes body-shaming such an easy thing to prevail in our society. The industry has made us hate almost anything natural about the human body – from stretch marks to love handles, is there anything even left to appreciate about a non-airbrushed body?

Sure, we have plus-sized models in the scene, who are slowing making way on to ramps and magazine covers, but our feeble minds are so used to seeking smooth, tight skins on those ramps and covers, that we forget how to appreciate a natural body. Plus-size models, although inspiring, amazing, and necessary, are called out for “promoting obesity and living an unhealthy lifestyle.” There’s a difference between fitness advice and body shaming, just like there’s a difference between fashion advice and putting people down for their body type or their weight.

Mindy Kaling very rightly said in an interview that sometimes people don’t realise that they’re going back to square one on this issue when they tell her stuff like “you’re setting goals for unconventional body type people.” Calling someone an “unconventional” body type when they’re not medically obese is just factually wrong. Forget about being insensitive, that’s inaccurate.

This, obviously, does not in any way imply that people can’t set fitness goals for themselves. It just comes down to not imposing the same on others and, especially, shaming them for being confident in their own skin (whether it is to your taste or not). Well, like they say: charity begins at home. Our battles against body-shaming can only be won when we look at ourselves in the mirror without cringing, without finding a single flaw in our natural selves.

Image Credits: The KN Clan

 

Anagha Rakta
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