Sex Amma

1.) Amma some of my friends keep talking about ‘fuck fat’. What is it? Is it true that my posterior will bloat up if I have too much sex? Please help.

Sometime I think it is true, my ahem, posterior as you so kindly put it did at one point of time require me to have two boat houses on the back waters lashed together so that the one I was in would not sink when I leant over one of the sides. But this was also when Ramaswamidu and me had just broken up after a really wild and raunch-itty relationship for 2 years. I think it has a lot to do with how comfortable your partner makes you feel about your body, that you don’t count the calories, and indulge your latent desires as much as you can, whether it is for chocolate or other things. IT has nothing to do with fat put on as a result of sex. But I am not very clear on this as I have lost a lot of weight ever since Ramaswamidu left my boat house.

2.) Dear Amma, I have been having a lot of sex recently, with multiple partners. Ofcourse protected sex! But I’m afraid I might have HIV. How do I know for sure. And where can I get tested without my family coming to know. Also how expensive is it.

Aiyo! Multiple partners good, HIV not so good. My dear child (after mine own heart) let me tell you. That today it is very easy to get checked. When I was young HIV stood for a hi 5 (sorry my recent lack of sexual exploits leaves me in a bad joke mood. Or maybe it is the effect of this cartoon strip that I am addicted to right next to my column called Vibby’s world. It is so very very funny!) yes but coming back to your quandary, today you can go to any clinic to get an HIV test that does blood samples. You can also get it done for minimal costs at any government hospital and you can choose to remain anonymous. Private hospitals are slightly more expensive. Spinal Injuries charges rupees 300 for an HIV test and you get your results within a few hours. A little research online and you can locate the nearest clinic and prices. Just google HIV testing. Don’t worry my child safe sex inevitable protects you. Look at me. I’ve done things few men would dream off and I’m still hale healthy and on the slightly pudgier side.




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