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By Olina Banerjee

UPBEAT:

ASI plans to give the Taj Mahal a Multani-Mitti face-lift

That’s not nearly as fun as Mayawati’s Shopping mall. Damn!

Spider man’s marriage annulled after twenty years

That’s only good news as long as that means we won’t have to put up with a red haired, nasal Kirsten Dunst in the next Spiderman movie.

Clowns universally hated by children, says survey

You don’t say. Who likes grinning idiots anyway? Oh wait….America does.

A US biotech firm has announced a genetic test kit that can predict the likelihood of baldness in men

Well that’s brilliant! Couples can now plan their mid-life crises years in advance.

One in twelve US combat troops suffer from trauma

…. And not one of them was called Bush.

DOWNBEAT:

DeGeneres dethrones Oprah as America’s favorite talk show host

Gay woman vs. Black woman. America’s republicans must have shot themselves.

Hillary Clinton would love to be America’s next top model

With all due respect, your husband’s already cheated on you. So this is hardly going to help….

Eklavya out of Oscar’s race

ChUk De India!

Britany Spears wants to convert to Islam

The only thing funnier than this headline is TOI’s absolute insistence that converting to Islam is a mentally deranged thing to do….

Australia has outlawed uranium sales to India because Delhi has not signed the nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty (NPT)

Yeah! First you call one of them a ‘monkey’ and then you expect them to play nice….

Journalism has been called the “first rough draft of history”. D.U.B may be termed as the first rough draft of DU history. Freedom to Express.

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