Sex Amma

Sex Amma: Alternatives to Penetrative Sex

Dear Amma,

I know I’m an adult now, but I’m not ready to lose my virginity yet… at least not until I find the “right one” for me. But, I do want to have some fun. Masturbating alone has lost its excitement. What do you suggest I do?

Dear Machchi,

Ugh! I’m so tired of people assuming that there is no sex without penetration. No, my little idli, you don’t need to lose your virginity just yet. I understand it can be scary and you may want your first time to be with someone special. Not everyone is lucky enough to find that someone so early in life and you’re still young. And, of course, you want to have fun; as I just said, you’re YOUNG! So, let’s get into some ways in which you can add some masala into your non-penetrative sex life.

When you’re with your partner, my chutney, you don’t need to resort to penetration just yet, and only making out can become dull after a while. So, as long as both of you are comfortable with it, let’s get a little kinky-

  1. Mutual Masturbation: As you’ve already mentioned, masturbation is a great way of attaining pleasure, as well as of discovering and understanding your own body and its needs. But surely after a while it loses the thrill when you’re alone. However, the excitement and pleasure can increase manyfold when there’s someone else to do it for you.
  • Video Sex or Sexting: When all of us are stuck at homes in this lockdown, this is perhaps the closest you can come to sex anyway. You can show off your bodies on video call, talk dirty and masturbate to each other and enjoy the fascination over the effect you can have on someone’s body from afar. Sexting is another similar alternative in case you’re too conscious to face the person.
  • Dry-Humping/ Frottage: Now, some people may not like the idea of dry humping but it can be another wonderful alternative when you’re conscious about being butt-naked in front of your partner. Rubbing your sex organs against each other in typical sex positions is a great way to get each other off.
  • Oral Sex: If we’re getting a little more comfortable with each other now, we can try our hands… excuse me, I mean mouths at oral sex. Some may even find it more pleasurable than penetration. If you wish to enjoy this mutually, 69 is considered the best position. I hope this wouldn’t need much explanation.

These should spice up your sex life enough for starters. But remember, my not-so-little idli, when you are ready for penetration, safety first. Make sure you don’t get carried away. But as long as you’re taking all precautions, happy sex!

Feature Image Credits: DU Beat Archives