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Addictions and obsessions are often associated with drugs and alcohol, however, there are a number of activities or substances in our daily life to which we are deeply addicted, but remain ignorant about.

1. Mobile Phones and Social Media:
In today’s world, a talk about obsession without a mention of the handy telephone is impossible. We, on a daily basis without even our notice spend around 3 to 4 hours in vain, on our mobile phones. Scrolling through social media to have a glimpse of what all is going on in the lives of others, we often end up ignoring what is going on in our own. Mobile gaming is another villain that keeps calling us, to pick up the device. Lost in a world of PubG, Call of Duty and Counter Strike, we fail to realise the shortcomings we are causing to our own world. Using electronic gadgets occasionally as a break from work or for a positive purpose is harmless, but feeling a continous and surfeit urge to scroll or play is what can make a person phonophobic.

2. Chai/Coffee Fuelled Survival:
With the common and trending slang quotes and memes, a dependency on coffee or tea is assumed to be hip and cool. But, trust me, it’s not. A person’s inability to meet the daily grind in the absence of a cup of chai or coffee, or facing difficulty in even getting up from sleep without the daily dose of caffeine is not something healthy. Dependency on anything or anyone never gets counted in the positives. It is only the strength and ability to manage every condition, every circumstance, that makes one rise above mediocrity. So, all those who attach a tag of coffee-holic and tea-lovers to themselves, need to understand that having your cup of coffee or kadakchai thrice a day due to the immense love you have for its flavour is no bad but, having it because without it, your routine will not be able to function, is a serious issue which needs to be worked upon.

3. Fitness Freaks:
Gym and exercising are good only until they benefit the body and enhance your health, but once they starts to have an opposite effect of over-straining and begin giving excessive fatigue to your body, they become a hazard. Especially when despite of physical pain, you find yourself unable to avoid straining physical exercise, you become an addict. People, who even after a serious injury or breakdown, cannot resist going to the gym or resting their daily work-out regime, become at risk to causing extreme trouble to themselves and their bodies. So, all the gym-freaks out there, it is fine to relax for a day. Even John Cena and The Undertaker probably have their cheat days.

4. Porn Addiction:
Sexual needs and a want for their satisfaction is something that every person desires for and therefore taking support of pornographic material available online is not something viscous. But, again facing a depravity of sleep or a sense of discomfort in its absence is harmful. Over doing can have serious health implications for both males and females. Self-control is not something only necessary for the well-being of your body but is also beneficial to your mental health.

5. Shopping: A Guilty Pleasure
An excessive urge to shop is a medically recognized addiction known as, Oniomania. Making yourself fall in debt just to buy shiny branded articles makes you an Omnomaniac. It usually arises with a feeling of depression or a constant thinking of perceiving oneself inferior from others. One can understand its serious implications on their bank balance from our very favourite Rebecca Bloomwood in Confessions of a Shopaholic.

Image Credits: Headspace

Kriti Gupta

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From deodorants, chocolates, to mango drinks, anything and everything can turn into a sexual innuendo when it comes to commercialisation of sex.

They say that the only constant is change, but the one fact about business that has not changed is this: sex sells, and it sells large and fast. For the student population, pornography has a multi-layered significance. In terms of education, pornography provides a plethora of possibilities for research and dialogue. Its feminist understanding, religious connotations, psychological significances, political debates, and discourses from across disciplines are unending. To young individuals, porn supplies an entire spectrum of entertainment.

Criticism of pornography has been heavy, but sometimes misguided. Shaurya Singh Thapa, a second-year History student at Hindu College, offers an insight into the seldom discussed diversity presented in the porn industry, “We talk about diversity these days, and surprisingly, porn has a lot of representation (in terms of sexualities, body sizes, races, etc) and I appreciate that. It might be capitalistic in nature to cater to sexualities and preferences, but if it is not making your relationship abusive or making you addicted, it is a source of pleasure, and I think that is its positive side.”

However, the other side of the argument regarding porn may question the kind of representation diversity truly derives from porn. Feminist scholar, Ann Garry, analysed why sexual objectification of particular groups may be harmfully related to the loss of respect, for the entire class. She writes, “Losing respect for men as a class (men with power, typically Anglo men) is more difficult than losing respect for women or ethnic minorities as a class.”

One may even be of the belief that like all art, porn should get creative liberties. Its function, after all, is to stimulate one’s sexual desires based on their personal preferences, so why must it be brought to determine the moral fabric of its society? However, the political, legal, and hence universal interests in pornography make it impossible to be dismissive of the psychology and sexual morality porn targets. The influence of porn, like all art, is real but it is more threatening in its reality because online porn is visual, and that increases its reach massively.

The influence of porn cannot be dismissed, and its connotations ignored, because sex as an act is most often linked with harm, or at least negatively, in the society. Thus, when one watches women being slut-shamed, ethnicities being dehumanised through stereotyping, and resistance being the doorway to pleasure, it opens the psychological possibility of living those scenarios.
In Conversations with a Killer: The Ted Bundy Tapes, Bundy admits to having been “without question, without exception, deeply influenced and consumed by addiction to pornography”. As a psychopath serial killer and rapist, Bundy’s intents may not be trusted at face value, but it only adds value to a pattern of men pointing towards pornography as an enabler for their violent tendencies. As a concept, pornography does not intend violent influences, but a large chunk of porn shows resistance as foreplay.

Besides, with the unrealistic imagery of sex and its pleasures porn acts as a blow to self-esteem and causes disappointment in its practices.

Despite these criticisms, we shouldn’t degrade porn as whole. The narrative that needs to be set in non-derogatory form of porn is of sex being a healthy fulfillment of mutual desires between individuals who want it. The narrative needs change, because misrepresentation of communities and desires is the common phenomenon, and sex does not have to sell on it.

Featured Image credits- Pixabay
Featured image caption- Sex is a normal occurrence in real life but it’s to be understood that porn isn’t a representation of real life.

Anushree Joshi
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Q. My boyfriend loves to watch porn and every time we get intimate he tells me to watch it too and learn new things. He remains very unsatisfied with our time, but I dislike porn. I just can’t stand watching it. How can I make him see the other way?

A. Ayyioo!

My naughty idlis caught in a mix of curries!

First things first, it’s completely okay to have different views from your partner on this one. The adult industry is made for entertainment and you have the right to not like it, so it’s perfectly alright to not watch it. Porn films, like any other media these days, are all about putting up a show, so don’t expect the things you see online to happen in a real situation. They are educational for some or can be just entertainment, but unrealistic expectations from porn should not be borne into real life situations.

Real life intimate situations can take on many shapes, believe Amma! Whatever your recipe is for dosa making, the end product should always be a feeling of mutual respect and fun. This can only be the case if you both are comfortable with each other. Your partner’s dissatisfaction can be helped if you both talk about each other’s likes and dislikes and reach a common ground. Do get to know more about each other’s preferences and do not give in to the digital image of sex.

As Amma always says, communication is the key, my idli! Feel comfortable and get naughty; introducing new spices into your dosa batter is never a bad idea. So try what you can and remember to always be safe.