A university considered liberal when it comes to choice of attire, DU has now decided to pass a new notification that will ban skirts for girls early next semester. The reason for the same (according to our sources) is being sighted as the ‘cold days ahead’. DU, which has been in surprisingly close touch with the MET department these days, is closely looking at the temperature markings for the coming days and has decided that it is too cold for female students to wear skirts.

The decision came after an application was filed and submitted to the VC’s office by Professor Magan Daaruwala from the department of ancient studies. In the application, professor Daaruwala wrote, “Every year I see girls shivering in the winter while wearing skirts and my sympathy towards them is what has lead me to write this letter”, because apparently (as Mr. Magan thinks) the need to be fashionable overpowers the need to stay warm in today’s generation.

The notification, which came out yesterday evening has sent chills across the student community in DU. When we asked for reactions, Ms. Ghevar Mithai, who is currently pursuing Political Science hons. From JMC vented out her rue over the decision. “Who is the university to decide what we decide to wear or not; never expected such a notification” she said in a heated interview session with our correspondent. On anonymity, another girl from Hindu college told us how inappropriate it would be to ban skirts and how this will only lead to banning the same in summers as well.

Right wing activists on the other hand have welcomed the decision and are fully supporting it. “Wearing skirts is against bhartiya sanskriti and there should be a total ban on them”, one of the activists told us. Ms. Sadabahaar Khosla, a teacher from Laxmibai College who is among those known for having leftist views counterattacked the right wing organisations and stated that these organisations are responsible for sending our society back to medieval times. Among this debate, most students and teachers seemed to have forgotten the original reason for which the notification was issued which is not to attack our liberalism but simply to protect girls from the cold days ahead.

 

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Disclaimer: Bazinga is DU Beat’s weekly column of almost believable fake news!

Seems like the anti incumbency wave that hit the Parliament this May, was majorly the people’s desire to usher an era of change. And, the famous development model, and the man behind it,both have become the unanimous choice of the people as the harbingers of such claimed prosperity and change, the ‘Achche Din’.

While P.M. to be is yet to be sworn in for the designation and hasn’t yet assumed the office, the impact of his great aura, exemplary vision and impeccable principles has begun to trickle down. The oldest of the political bodies in India has been decimated, the common man’s party is undergoing an existence crisis, and the winning party is all set to make history forming a government, unopposed.

The trickle down isn’t limited to political, financial and economic spheres but have also affected the realm of Delhi University. In a startling event yesterday,the D.U. officials did not summon the police to curb the menace caused by a protest staged by group of students outside the V.C.’s office at North Campus. Instead, they came out of the air conditioned offices  and engaged in a dialogue with the protesting students, offering solutions to their problems.

Thus, the officials who have become disciplined and wary of being observed, are trying to follow the ethical code of conduct to avoid facing any music in this phase of transition from a callous to tightly held government.

Adhering to the party’s manifesto promises about withdrawal of F.Y.U.P., the would be Minister of Education in  the new Parliamentary cabinet has rebuked F.Y.U.P. calling it “non essential activity of blindly aping education structure of West”. Also, the would be Minister of Human Resources, has called it “a wasteful exploitation of young minds, serving no good.” However, any concrete steps in this regard haven’t been taken.

“The new Education Department is working upon its policies, there shall be the introduction of some new subjects like ‘Hegemony: The Concept and Thrust’ and ‘Section 377: The Law, The Ideals and Beyond’ at the under graduation level in all universities of India to connect the youth to the core of India.” said a newly elected M.P.

Rumour has it, that the Delhi University logo shall be given a brand new saffron background and that it shall be beautified with the party symbol flowers garnered all over. Why not? After all, D.U. is the face of India and Indian education.

Meanwhile the University official’s bid to appear in good books of the new management of the country has left the college authorities in trouble. “We’ve been accustomed to do things our way,without any interference from previous state or central government. Aaj bachche hostel maang rahe hai. Kal achha khaana maangenge. Fir bolenge pani ke taps theek karao, ladkiyoko suraksha do. Aisa kab tak chalega? ” said, a reputed college’s principal on condition of anonymity.

‘Achche Din’ aane waale hain, yes!

 

Disclaimer: Bazinga is DU Beat’s weekly column of almost believable fake news!