By DU Beat
5. Get everyone to play Big Boss (reminiscent of 1984, perhaps?)
4. Get Amir Khan to make a movie about how awesome your rule would be. That should convince everyone through discussions in newspapers, news channels etc.
3. Pretend to have a highly contagious disease and threaten to sneeze if everyone doesn’t give in to your rule.
2. [...]
By DU Beat
5. Silvio Berlusconi and Bill Clinton: for their common taste in ‘other friends’.
4. Kashmira Shah and Madonna: So that they can both act their age.
3. Wile E. Coyote and Sylvester: They never ever seem to catch their prey.
2. Kylie Minogue and Akshay Kumar: because we just can’t take them seriously after jiggy-wiggy.
1. Rakhi Sawant [...]
By DU Beat
1. Prepare to have hours of free time. You WILL be having a lot of time on your hands- in between classes, waiting for your friends to come (because you will want to travel in packs), waiting for the lecture to begin, and then praying for the lecturer to leave!
[...]
By DU Beat
1) Get a body double to attend classes for you. Going by the fact that you’re facing an acute attendance problem, the teacher will probably not remember your face anyway
2) Record your voice saying “present ma’am/ sir!” and ask your friend to play it whenever needed
3) Submit a medical explaining how it’s impossible for you [...]
By DU Beat
1) Televisions in all colleges. Because our poor overworked brain cells need a break from all the studying and no, free yoga classes will not be accepted as a substitute
2) Inclusion of Walking In The Fields, Cheering Basketball Team From The Sides, Socializing and a few others under ECA.
3) Provision for Attendance Banks where nerds with too much [...]
By DU Beat
1. Furry bags: Bags that look like they will come alive any second and go “woof!” are not cool. They are meant to carry stuff in, not to be used as substitute pets so go hide them before PETA gets onto your case.
2. Excessive colour: Rainbows look pretty [...]
By DU Beat
1. For the most consistent bunk-er: For those charitable students who sacrifice their seats in the lecture rooms and choose instead to disperse their pocket money among the poor, underpaid canteen employees. Long live their generous souls!
2. For the slowest canteen service: For those equally wonderful canteen employees who reward our generous souls with stale, half-cooked food [...]
By DU Beat
1. The more you refuse a job, the more eager they will be to hire you.
2. One can take a road trip to Ladakh in borrowed pants and bridal dress without bothering to stop by a woolens shop on the way. Friends provide the warmth in our lives we suppose.
3. One can offer to ‘invent’ common devices long [...]
By DU Beat
1. Kidnap all the polar bears and stuff them into your fridge
2. Give the cattle a strict talk on etiquette and the inappropriateness of farting in public
3. Puncture the tyres of all vehicles in your locality and offer your cycle on rent instead. This way, you save the planet and make money as well. W00t!
4. [...]
By DU Beat
1) Kidnap all the polar bears and stuff them into your fridge
2) Give the cattle a strict talk on etiquette and the inappropriateness of farting
in public
3) Puncture the tires of all vehicles in your locality and offer your cycle on
rent instead. This way, you save the planet and make money as well.
W00t!
4) Save paper, save [...]
