The tale of the dreaded day begins with a sleepless night. Tossing and turning, with momentary lapses of sleep, a recent school pass-out wakes up in the morning to realise the nuanced importance of the day.
The early arrival of the day which has been etched in the pages of history as the origin of happiness and dejection has left the internet inspired in a chaos of woes. The Bollywood-influenced memes, the rhetoric of future detachment from these scores, the brimming anxiety, and the inhabitants of the community who pester you with good wishes and unreasonable expectations – a recent pass-out is subjected to a spectrum of emotions in the hours preceding D-Day. Regardless of the significance of these marks, the fact that almost everyone is affected, positively or negatively, by the outcome of the result cannot be conveniently ignored. You might try to reason with yourself and endeavour to overcome the fear that grips the reins of your heart tonight; yet, it sustains and thrives. While no array of advice can prove to be advantageous in placating your worries, the idea of knowing what to expect tomorrow can temporarily soothe your vexed heart.
Fantasising multiple scenarios: As you lead up to the hours before you shall login to the CBSE website, the insecurities in your head and heart will probe you to predict the possible scores. All efforts shall be involved in calculating your Best of Four with these hypothetical cases, based on a presumptive knowledge of how well your paper went two months ago. While optimism is a human strength and necessity, try to keep the hopes on an average scale. You shall get more than what you anticipated, or you shall receive a score which was the nightmare of your dreams. Scores have been known to increase through re-evaluation, so don’t let your confidence fool you. Anything and everything can happen.
The familial conundrum: They are the Tom Hanks to your Leonardo DiCaprio; you can’t outrun them. All the jests conceptualised from the anecdotes of your dur ke relatives are known to resonate with reality. Your parents’ phone shall be the ground base of the familial expectations, and all those family groups which have been muted for one year would blast with messages preceding and succeeding the event. How do you tackle this unsought hassle? Ask your parents to maintain the concrete barrier between the questions of the relatives and your state.
Technical glitches and moment of truth: Fables of the technical issues pervading the realms of the CBSE website must have been made known to you through the grapevine. These are real, and extremely perturbing. Try to remember that thousands of applicants will be trying to gain access to their results, so patience is the key. Avoid being in public at the time when the results are expected to come; the delay in opening the website and the chaotic environment might enhance the maelstrom of dilemma in your mind. Also, CBSE is not known to be punctual. The results can come either before the estimated time or after. When it does, your heartbeats will fasten when you see this screen:
The aftermath: The bomb has been dropped and your mind is in a state of frenzy. Science, Commerce, Humanities – these areas of study are now being perceived by you in a completely different way. You might be ecstatic with that triple digit score, you might be overjoyed with the 95+ marks in the majority of subjects, or you might be overwhelmed with attaining the score you’ve always dreamt of. Scenario 2: you might be dejected, you might be devastated. An idea in your conscience which reiterated everyday that you deserved to attain the highest possible marks for your hard work has now been defeated. For the former set, heartiest congratulations on this feat. For the latter, congratulations on displaying the best of your efforts, and finally being relieved of this bower. It might not have been what you expected, it might have been the reality of your worst nightmare – and we’re here to tell you that it’s okay.
Your dejection and disappointment might linger for hours, days, and weeks. Your capabilities might be put into question by the voices in your head. Remember, as important as it is to let your guard down and feel low for a while, don’t succumb to that vulnerability. The road after this milestone stretches miles and miles further, and you have yet to accomplish great feats. Apply for re-evaluation after discussing with your teachers if you feel you deserve more, look for prospective colleges and courses based on this outcome, apply for ECA to increase your chances, and muster the courage to look beyond this trough.
You will find yourself returning to the question of the significance of these marks. Does a sheet of paper deserve to decide your future? Indubitably not. Will that sheet of paper decide your future? Not necessarily. Not if you choose to accept the result for what it is and decide to undertake the next challenge. Not if you harbour the courage to negate your wallowing with newer ambitions. Not if you realise that where the road ends and where the next ‘chapter’ of your lives begin, it’s going to be okay.
All the best!
Feature Image Credits: SarkariLife