Sex Amma

Sex Amma: How do I ask him if he is gay?

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Q. Amma, I’m gay and I really like a guy. But I don’t know whether he is gay. How do I find out without offending him?

A. My sweet macchi, love certainly has no boundaries, and hence extreme discretion is advised. You like dosas and they might like you back. But finding out if someone has the same taste as you can be a tough job!

If the other person is already your friend, then the surest way to know is if he opens up to you. In case that doesn’t happen, my idli, you need to observe and find out if he likes vadas, and whether he has a girlfriend. You can always ask, but keep in mind that you ask for the right reasons and respectfully, if you don’t want him to be offended.

Little idli, also keep in mind a few don’ts. You can’t go around asking all his friends if he’s gay. Also, if you plan to ask him directly, then respect his space if he denies it. Some people might not be ready to come out of the closet just as yet and you should respect their personal space.

In the end, remember to be very careful with the hot tava, my idli. Learn to move on, as there are plenty of fish around you, yet to be caught!

Providing guidance to the students of DU since 2008 on matters of sex, dating and intimacy, Amma is back again this week with her dose of advice. Want to ask Amma a query? Mail it to [email protected].

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