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Sex Amma: She likes to call out her favourite footballer’s name instead of mine!

Amma, all is good when my girlfriend and I are doing it until she moans her favourite footballer’s name. It’s a major turn off and has made me hate that player even though he’s one of my favourites.
She feels guilty and tries to make up for it by giving head, which she normally does not do. I don’t know what to feel. Should I continue guilt-tripping her or should I be sterner?

Oh! Another FIFA-fevered machhi! Dear little (or not) rava masala dosa of mine, football makes people do crazy stuff. You should be relieved it’s not a cricketer, Amma can never stand cricket or its fans.

However, your girl might be one of those people who watch football, not just for the love of the game, but also because some of the players..oh, they look absolutely delectable! Can’t blame a girl for imagining the naughty with them hotties. You could scream the player’s name too, that’d confuse her and you both might end up having a good time while you’re, well, having a good time. And hey, maybe you could pretend to be a star footballer, while she acts as a die hard fan. What an inspired idea for role play! Amma is a genius!

I’d suggest you let things be as they are. As soon as FIFA is over, she’ll be back to screaming your name. Take it easy, it’s not so bad. And hey, free and willing head! Win-win!



Journalism has been called the “first rough draft of history”. D.U.B may be termed as the first rough draft of DU history. Freedom to Express.


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