Sex Amma

Sex Amma

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“Hello Sex Amma,

Me and my GF have been in a relationship for a year. In the last one year we almost lived like a Live-in at her place and we used to have sex very often , almost daily ,sometimes , twice in a day (with some days exception) , But as of now we live apart due to studies, and I miss everything so badly, I cannot have control over ‘things’ . Please suggest how should I control and what to do..”

 

My dear lost little lobster of the Southern seas! You two have been very naughty fishes, frying in coconut oil! You lucky lad and lady! Amma went to the beach when people asked her to get a room. You’ve had one for a year. But, the wind and the waves of joy. Ah! Anyway, high-five for the awesome ex-sex life!

My lovely lobster, nothing is permanent, is it?  Study, and study hard so that you two can end up together! But, Amma understands, so I’d suggest you to throw away your pen every once in a while and use your hand for other activities, eh? The Americans have made sure that nobody goes sex-less when alone. Tune into their ‘artsy’ movies and let things fall in their place (do clean up afterwards!!). Graham Bell might not have thought of it, but his invention can work wonders for your deprived, er, soul. Let her oohs and aahs over the phone send you into a frenzy! And if you can’t talk over the phone, geniuses of the world have created texting, and other geniuses who have gone the extra mile have created sexting. Try it, my boy!

I’ll pray that you somehow get your hands on the Anywhere Door from Doraemon. How easy it’d be! Besides, you’re a male macchi, visuals can turn you on. Think about your poor female macchi who needs to get touchy-feely for her dose. So, ride high and solo for a while on crashing waves and breaking thunder! Do let Amma know how it’s working for you. Cheers!

 

Have a query? But don’t know who to ask? Mail  your queries to Sex Amma a[email protected].

 

 

Journalism has been called the “first rough draft of history”. D.U.B may be termed as the first rough draft of DU history. Freedom to Express.

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